Steve Morrison From Preston & Steve Is Deathly Afraid of Being Buried Alive

He also does an incredible gorilla impression and will take all comers in jai alai.

My name is … Steve Morrison. Well, technically, Stephen Michael Paul Morrison. Paul is my confirmation name, but it wasn’t for Saint Paul. It was for Paul McCartney.

I am an … avid cross-dresser. And a radio personality.

The last time I had a drink … was a Champagne toast at a wedding a few months ago. But other than that, I don’t drink. Never liked the taste of alcohol.

I am deathly afraid of …
being buried alive. I’m not fully claustrophobic, but that always seemed to be the most horrific way to die. When I was a kid, though, I thought I’d be attacked by a witch who would kill me by stapling me under my bedsheets, so I always slept with one finger out to pull out the staples. It seemed to be valid at the time, but I was never murdered by a witch, so I guess not.

One junk food I cannot give up …
are chocolate chip cookies, the way my wife makes them. She jams those mothers with chocolate chips. Three times the recommended amount.

I live in … Manayunk. But technically, Wissahickon. I’ve been here nine years, and I love it. I’m two minutes from work.

You will never beat me at …
jai alai. Or at least the odds of you being able to prove that you could would be nominal.

My secret talent … is that I am a pretty good artist. Sketches and comic book stuff. I also do a mean gorilla impression. Very authentic. Very true to a Gorillas in the Mist kind of gorilla.

I got my first tattoo …
on the air many years ago. The Flyers were in the playoffs, and so we all got Flyers tattoos. John Bolaris got one too, but his ass got infected. His was on his butt. I got mine on my ankle.

If I need to relax … I watch movies. I am a big fan of horror and sci-fi. I’m a geek. But I’m a real deal geek. Not the trendy, chic kind of cool geek.

You will never find me … watching TV talent shows.

If you really want to piss me off … don’t be courteous, don’t be civil, don’t be kind.

I shouldn’t tell you this about Preston … but he is a failed foot model.

The last time I broke the law … I removed a tag from a piece of furniture.

If given the choice between a Rolls-Royce and Lamborghini …
I’d have to go with a Lamborghini. But I guess it depends on what kind of Rolls-Royce.

I go to bed … at 10 and go to sleep at 11. And I wake up at 3:56, because that seems so much later than 3:55.

One thing about Philly that drives me crazy … is people walking slowly across intersections.

The last time I had hair … was about 14 years ago. I looked like Roy Batty from Blade Runner.

If you’re going to take me out to dinner … take me to the Ugly Moose or Cooper’s in Manayunk or the Harvest in University City.

The best album ever made … was probably Sgt. Pepper’s. But a close second would be Steely Dan’s Aja.

If I wasn’t doing this … I’d be selling blood.

* For an interview with the other half of Preston & Steve, Preston Elliot, click here.