You Probably Won’t Have to Spend $800 on the iPhone 5

Two trending topics on Twitter (#800dollarsforaniphone and iPhone 5 $800) prompted everyone with an Internet connection to suggest that the newest installment of Apple’s life-changing device should do all sorts of unspeakable things, if it’s going to cost $800. Here’s the thing, though: the iPhone already costs $800. The unlocked 32GB iPhone 4S sells for $749. The 64GB is $849. The iPhones purchased with a two-year contract, though, are much more reasonably priced. Also, the $800 price is purely speculation. So, instead of asking Siri to touch you in your down-there, just relax and realize that all of the spectacular crap that will come with the iPhone 5 (or whatever they’re calling it) will be subsidized by wireless companies. No one will ask you for your first born. [Time]