Mitt Romney Gets Spray Tans

The American people were treated to one hell of an October surprise today when a “knowledgeable source” confirmed that GOP presidential candidate Mitt Romney gets spray tans before nationally televised events. THE HORROR. If you hadn’t decided before, you probably have now. The source says that Romney pays for the service out of pocket, as opposed to using campaign finances to fund his pertinent and necessary procedure. [BuzzFeed]