These Carson Wentz Bootleg Jerseys Are Hilarious (And Hideous)

Exited about the Eagles’ new quarterback? Don’t buy any of these jerseys to celebrate.

Carson Wentzmania got even bigger this week, as the Eagles went into Chicago and beat up on the Bears, 29-14. Carson Wentz has played two games and, so far, he can do no wrong.

Wentz went 21-for-34 for 190 yards and a touchdown in Monday night’s win. Coach Doug Pederson says Wentz is playing like a 10-year vet. The Eagles had the best point differential in the league after Week 2. They are 2-0 for the first time since 2014. They are going to the Super Bowl, baby!

Okay, they’re not Super Bowl-bound. But people are excited about the Eagles rookie QB. Wentz’s hot start has the bootleggers going wild: Hustlers were selling bootleg Wentz T-shirts on two different Center City corners this morning, and online there are a ton of Wentz bootleg jerseys of various styles and colors.

Which brings us to a website I came across earlier this week: Designed to look like the NFL’s official website, this bootleg site has some of the worst NFL jerseys I’ve ever seen. Let’s take a look.

Midnight Green Men’s Stitched Elite Noble Fashion Jersey

I might as well start with the worst. This Carson Wentz jersey has:

  • pinwheels in a strip on the bottom and on the front above the number
  • a generic bridge on the front, which for the sake of argument we’ll say is the Walt Whitman
  • a Liberty Bell on the back without a giant crack, as if it had been fixed by using the Photoshop healing brush
  • Eagle wings drawn on the back

This jersey is so bad I got through the list without mentioning that it spells his name VENTZ. There will be more of that. The Eagles should be allowed to kick you out of the stadium if you wear this.

Black Men’s Stitched Elite Pro Line Gold Collection Jersey

If it didn’t have the logo on the side, you would have no idea this was a jersey for an Eagles quarterback. Also, said side logo appears to be gold-tinted as well — so maybe this is actually a jersey for a different person (Ventz) who plays for a team nicknamed the Gold Eagles.

Midnight Green/Black Men’s Stitched Elite Fadeaway Fashion Jersey

I’m one of the people who likes the Eagles’ black jersey best of all. I want the Eagles to play in kelly green. But if they can’t, I prefer black to “midnight green.”

Lights Out Grey Men’s Stitched Elite USA Flag Fashion Jersey

This looks like a 9/11 memorial jersey. At least it says WENTZ on the back.

Green Women’s Stitched Limited Salute to Service Jersey

Here is a jersey for the servicewoman in your life, I guess. This is now more than I can handle. Article over.

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