I’m Never Flying Southwest Out of Philadelphia Again

A Southwest Airlines plane at Philadelphia International Airport, where Southwest will start charging checked bag fees as of May 28th (photo via Jimmy Emerson/Flickr/Creative Commons)

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Southwest Airlines to Start Charging For Checked Bag, Leading to My Personal Boycott

If you’ve been reading me for a good long time, you probably already know that I will never fly the country’s worst airline ever again. It’s a boycott I’ve been enforcing since 2017. And I’m sticking to it. But now I need to add another airline boycott to my list: Southwest.

I’ve enjoyed flying Southwest out of Philadelphia International Airport at times over the years. Depending on what route you’re taking and if you nail a sale, the prices can be really attractive. And they’re made all the more attractive by what is otherwise an unheard of perk these days: you can check your bags for free. For decades, Southwest Airlines has used the motto “Bags Fly Free.” But no more. Not as of May 28th.

Why would they do such a thing? Well, a private equity firm snatched up a bunch of Southwest stock. And the firm is forcing the change in an effort to drive up the stock price. And who cares about customer service and satisfaction, right?

In a statement this week, the CEO of Southwest Airlines had this to say as part of an explanation for the termination of the beloved free bags policy: “We have tremendous opportunity to meet current and future customer needs, attract new customer segments we don’t compete for today, and return to the levels of profitability that both we and our shareholders expect.”

No word what the Southwest checked bag fees will be. And I’m never going to find out.

The Police Blotter

There are plenty of places you can go to find out about the latest shootings in the city. Have at it. But I do love a good heist story. And when it’s a meat heist, all the better. Sadly for the carnivorous thieves, police thwarted their attempt.

By the Numbers

38 degrees: Approximate temperature of the water that my colleague just submerged herself in to write this story about a trendy spa treatment. That’s, er, cool and all. But I still win the prize for crazy cold water stupidity after doing this.

0: Chances that you’re going to land a job at the University of Pennsylvania, except for some very specific positions. Why? The institution has declared a hiring freeze. So maybe you’ll have more luck at Harvard. Nope. They’ve instituted a hiring freeze as well. Why? Yes. Federal funding uncertainty.

27,000: Poll worker positions open for election this year. The problem is that there’s a shortage of candidates. If you’ve ever thought of maybe running for elected office, do it!

Reader Mail

I published two immigration-related stories yesterday. This one. And this one. And it’s fair to say I received lots of responses, including from people who clearly didn’t read the article on which they were commenting. Such is life these days. One response of note came from Chuck Peruto, the famed Philly criminal defense attorney who ran as a Republican against Larry Krasner. Here’s what Chuck had to say:

I want to read about our expensive manpower arresting illegal alien criminals, not illegal alien workers, filling jobs no one wants. If an illegal has the misfortune of surfacing during a traffic stop, or argument, of course arrest, hold and deport. But this manhunt is expensive, and will actually hurt the economy.

I take exception to your terms “illegal alien” and “illegal,” Chuck. But otherwise, generally agree. I will go one step further just to say that I don’t think ICE should be arresting people just because they got here illegally. Patrol the border, yes. And then go arrest those scads of murderers, rapists, and drug dealers who got into the country illegally, the ones Trump loves to scream about on his bullhorn. And once you get all of them, let’s see where we’re at before we start arresting people who came here illegally but worked here for years, raised families, contributed to their communities, etc.

Local Talent

Because it doesn’t have better things to do, Philadelphia City Council has decided to give Will Smith his own street in the city. Smith is getting an honorary street placard on the 2000 block of North 59th Street. West Philly, yo. Some of you might be thinking that the guy who slapped Chris Rock in front of an international television audience doesn’t deserve his own street. I say, the guy responsible for the After Earth tragedy doesn’t rate a Philly street, as much as I still love “Parents Just Don’t Understand.”