Surprise! DeSean Jackson Was at a Miami Strip Club While You Were Eating Breakfast

If you want to do hoodrat stuff wit your friend “Dashawn” Jackson, then you should have been at the King of Diamonds Gentleman’s Club (the site is probably NSFW, but definitely worth a click if you have headphones—”I don’t think you heard me—I say GUEST.LIST.FRIDAY”) in Miami at 6 a.m. today. That’s where the wide receiver was hanging out with @HeavenKODDiva. Yes, she’s a stripper. Yes, her name is Molly a k a Milli. Yes, she pisses excellence. Yes, she’s literally wearing a tape measure. Yes, this is exactly the type of place we expect DeSean Jackson to be at 6 a.m. on a Tuesday. [Deadspin]