Memo to All CEOs: You’ve Been Drafted!

Calling all CEOs — your country needs you.

There was a time when the problems of the government would attract the Best and the Brightest. Now we have The Good, The Bad and The Ugly , but mostly the Bad and the Ugly.

There is a brain drain in this country and America’s corporations are doing the draining. They get the top of the class from America’s universities, and the government is left to pick through the rest of the heap. Explains a lot doesn’t it? [SIGNUP]

You can’t really blame the upper crust for turning down government work like it’s cheap chardonnay. After all, who in their right mind is going to spend $300,000 on tuition and then take a mid-level job in the Commerce Department or become a legislative aide, especially when executives in the private sector are getting bonuses up to a half a Billion dollars. You would be stripped of your title as best and brightest if you did that.

But now we need all of you Corporate Executives to give something back to the country that gave you the incredible opportunity for wealth and success.

I can feel the Execs breaking out in a cold sweat now. Don’t worry. I’m not suggesting the government take any more of your money. You’ve been taxed enough. And with all of the creative accounting, tax shelters and corporate loopholes, you wouldn’t end up paying your share anyway.

No, I am suggesting that you work for the government for a couple of years. Think of it as the Peace Corps, but instead of going to San Salvador to solve their problems, you go to Washington and solve ours.

At this point, the idea of just writing a bigger check is sounding a lot better to the corporate executives.

But we have problems that their checkbooks won’t solve. No, we need their time, experience and brain power. We need the corporate quality controls, efficiency experts, financial advising, and most of all, we need that cut throat attitude and laser focus on not losing money.

We also want people in government who want to do their job quickly and efficiently and then get out. Right now we have lifelong bureaucrats, who want to keep the status quo and career politicians, who just want to win the next election. We need new blood and new ideas.

We need a corporate attitude.

Think of the United States as a corporation and think of the American taxpayers as the shareholders. We, the shareholders, believe our company is bloated, inefficient and failing. Like many other companies we accepted a government bailout from China. We, unfortunately, are not going to be able to pay it back as fast as some. The government as a company is more like AIG.

So we are looking for volunteers. Okay, you people from Goldman Sachs can put down your hands. We have plenty of you. Anybody else?

I thought so.

The word “volunteer” and the phrase “common good” aren’t covered in the MBA program and are contradictory to a good corporate philosophy.

And that is why we need to enact the Executive Draft.

Starting immediately we need to start sending notices to the country’s top executives and inform them that they have been drafted to help solve the government’s problems.

Once they get a good look at how government runs, there are sure to be layoffs, entire departments will be cut and budgets will be slashed. And for the first time ever, the government will shrink. It will be a leaner, meaner government.

There have been complaints since the birth of America that the poor and uneducated have paid a much higher cost in service to this country. With few real options, many end up in the military and on the battlefield.

This would be a way for those who avoid the military to also serve our country, fighting the enemies of our own device, like greed and incompetence. This would be a draft that they could not dodge, as it is a “vanity draft” designed specifically to get the best and brightest back into government.

Without a draft, it is just not going to happen and our government will continue to be run by those who have little interest in solving the problems of government, as they personally profit from them.

A draft is always a last resort measure in times of national crisis. We’re there. Let the Executive draft begin.