Nooooo: Calypso Closed and Pandora, the Worst Jewelry Store Ever, Is Opening In Its Spot

Or: Why do bad things happen to good people?

calypso pandora

Calypso’s storefront has been overtaken by Pandora ads. | Image via HughE Dillon.

It’s true: Calypso St. Barth on Walnut Street has shuttered its sunny doors and is passing the torch to Pandora. We’re not necessarily Calypso die-hards, but really? The 1600 block of Walnut Street is some of the most prime retail real estate in the city, and they’re handing over the keys to … Pandora?

The shopping scene in Philly is on the up and up, with major high-end brands moving in, giving local design talent an incentive to stay here. For better or worse, we’re home to Urban Outfitters, Anthropologie, Free People. We have some amazing boutiques that have become staples in our retail world like Joan Shepp and Knit Wit, selling beautiful, luxurious clothes for the Philadelphia woman. Men’s stores like Tobox Shoes and Commonwealth Proper are outfitting Philly men in sharp, dapper outfits like never before. Philly shopping is blowing up at the moment.

So why do we have to put a Pandora on Walnut?

Pandora stands for the one thing I hate in fashion: something that makes everyone look exactly the same (like Ugg boots and North Face fleeces and chambray). Here’s an idea – Instead of spending $70 on an ugly snowflake Pandora charm because it snowed that one time you went to New York with your girlfriend, why not get her some stunning baroque lace lingerie from Geisha House? Or take her to see her favorite band? Or gaze into her eyes over the most delicious pasta and bottle of wine at Amis? Really, anything would be more meaningful than that Pandora charm.

Everyone and their mother has or had a Pandora bracelet at some point (or at the very least considered getting one). Truth be told, they’re on their way out anyway thanks to those Alex and Ani bangles moving in on the “personalized” jewelry front. Remind me why we’re giving that coveted retail space to Pandora?

I never thought I’d say it, but I miss Calypso.