Pennsylvania Man Says Bigfoot Trashed His Winnebago

A man from Lykens, Pennsylvania—that’s 30 miles northeast of Harrisburg, for those of you unfamiliar with Pennsyltucky geography—told authorities that Sasquatch trashed his trailer. John Reed, a 39-year-old veteran bigfoot hunter and noted Insane Clown Posse fan (“Juggalos will carry on, swing our hatchets if we must.”) that manages the Lykens Valley Sasquatch Hunters Facebook page, told authorities that he’s been seeing bigfoots around the area and that one of them is responsible for the smashed taillights and windows on his 1973 Winnebago and HOW IS THIS NOT A MOVIE ALREADY?! Someone call the guys from Super Troopers and tell them they’re screwing up. Also, because it’s slack-off-til’-the-weekend Friday, you can watch all of the messin’ with Sasquatch commercials below. [6 ABC]