Dear G Philly: Answering Reader Questions
I have friends who spend a lot of time professing their love all over Facebook. But in real life, the whole relationship seems like it’s falling apart. They fight all the time and they’ve told other people that a breakup could be in the works. But you wouldn’t know it from Facebook where every other day one or the other is posting really sappy stuff. Should I just say to them what everyone’s already thinking?
Or you could just block them. Or ignore them. While nothing can be more distasteful than a couple of Facebook-crazed lovers intent on sharing their affections (real or not) with the world – or at least 1,000 of their “closest” friends – it’s impossible to know what’s really going on behind closed doors. Maybe in some bizarre way, this social media blitz is all part of their couples therapy? Or maybe they really do feel this way? Or maybe they are in deep, deep denial? No matter what the impetus, it’s really none of your business – even if it feels like they’re making it your business by chirping about it every day. Best advice: Ignore it. And move on. If you’re lucky, they’ll cool the status updates. If not, well, that’s why Zuckerberg invited the block option.
My old friend recently got into a relationship and is pretty much blowing everyone off in favor of her knew girlfriend. She’s been single for years, so I can understand the excitement in finding someone. But how can I let her know that I miss her, and would like to also see her once and awhile. I mean, just because you pair up doesn’t mean you need to ignore all the people who stood by you when you were alone, right? I’m also in a relationship, but I still make time for my friends.
Have you tried telling her how much you miss her? Or have you tried to arrange a night out, or brunch? Depending on how long your friend’s been in this relationship, she may just be swept up right now. But the best thing an old friend can do is make sure she knows you miss her, you care about her and you’d like to see her. Maybe try to set up a double date – that way you get to see her and you’ll get to know her girlfriend better. Just be patient. She may not even realize that she’s been a stranger. Rather than criticize, try being proactive in seeing her again.
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