Introducing the Horrid Invention That Is Google Glasses

Behold: Google’s most extensive peek yet at the profoundly invasive new “Glasses” technology (not yet on the market). In the video, you’ll witness users snapping pictures, shooting videos, translating words, sending text messages (speech-to-text), telling the temperature, cooking vichychoisse and other stuff your iPhone does. Except you just have to tell your glasses to do it, making it the only computer device mute people can’t use.

This invention, which Google previewed to a more limited extent in April, is disturbing for three main reasons. First, you can film people completely surreptitiously. Second, no one will have any idea whether you’re really looking at them or not, which will usher in a 21st century update on the still-unsettling “Is he on a bluetooth or is he schizophrenic?” phenomenon. Talk about glassy-eyed. Third, most alarmingly, Google will be able to track not just your emails and texts, but potentially, your every move, depending on how much you record. Like so many recent innovations in gadgetry, what appears to give the consumer greater freedom may result in just the opposite.

Interested in pre-ordering a pair for $1500 and a “special pick-up experience (schlep) in person?” You better be a “bold, creative individual.”