Gays Wanted on the Main Line

Looking for the right man (or men) for shopping, gossiping, spa-going and black-tie parties

There seems to be a shortage of one particular commodity on the Main Line: gay men. I realized this limitation had reached crisis proportions after my birthday party recently when one of my female friends accused me (jokingly, I think) of hogging all the gays. Apparently I have too many gay friends and haven’t been sharing the wealth. To count, there were exactly four gay men present. Not exactly a huge cache.

Gay men have always been great friends as well as hot accessories for women. I’m just going to go ahead here and attribute sweeping generalizations to an entire demographic. In my experience, they’re fun, gossipy, and usually have good jobs (read: the means to do things). They enjoy shopping, spas and black-tie events, have great taste, and don’t compete for the same men—hopefully. For married women, they make wonderful platonic companions. They’ll give solid feedback on how your hair or outfit look and fill in where straight men (read: husbands) fall short. They’re right up there with the Birkin bag.

I have always had gay friends. Even before I knew they were gay. Or they knew they were gay. Back in high school in the ’80s, before coming out was cool. Even on the conservative remote island I used to live on I found gay friends. When I moved to the Main Line I discovered quickly they were few and far between. We did become friends with a terrific gay couple that we met through our respective children’s school, but they might possibly be the only ones I’ve come across on the Main Line outside of a hair salon. They’re almost celebrated among our straight social circle.

I met another gay couple this year at the Philadelphia Flower Show preview party. It makes sense, really—what better place to find gay friends? I did meet this couple by accident, as it happens, sitting next to them at dinner. Since that night they’ve practically become my new best friends, and they were a big hit at my party. However, they are from New Jersey, as are some of my other gay friends. Our township is so dry I have to import.

It didn’t occur to me that anyone else had noticed the scarcity of local gays until recently when I was speaking to another friend. Apparently her socialite mother is actively searching for a gay best friend. Her father is getting older and doesn’t like to go out anymore. He’s tired of the social scene and wants to stay home. The mother is a little younger and, like most women, is not quite as tired. She wants to dress up and go out. Escorted. Who better than a gay man to fill this void?

I realize that bringing about a mass-influx of one group of people to the Main Line is a challenging proposition. Maybe I can provide some food for thought. Yes, the Gayborhood is a great place to live (and admittedly, much more happening), and Media is very charming and quaint. Nevertheless, we have some things going for us, and I want gay men to be aware of the warm welcome they would receive here. There are lots of parties to dress up for, pools to lounge by and horse shows that I hear even Carson Kressley has attended. We have valet parking at Neiman’s, members of the Cricket Club to join for lunch, homes to renovate, and women to go antiquing with. All these things are just waiting for you. And if you think that shoe shopping with these women is fun, try HOUSE shopping!

See you at Du Jour?