Worst Halloween Food Costumes: A Foobooz PSA

Halloween is coming. And Halloween means Halloween parties–Halloween parties where you, Philly’s foodiest of folks, might be tempted to try and dress as one (or more) of your favorite food items.

And while that is all well and good, we here at Foobooz World HQ would merely like to advise some caution. Food costumes can be awesome if done properly, but food costumes can also be the saddest of all possible costumes when done poorly. Sadder than the recently single 40-something mother of 3 trying to dress like a slutty nurse? Yes. Sadder than the balding accountant inside the full suit of stormtrooper armor? Yes. Sadder than the drunk jerk in the corner still trying to pull off that Austin Powers costume from 10 years ago? Well, okay. Maybe not as sad as that, but close.

After the jump, we have assembled several of the most depressing, dispiriting or just plain wrong costumes available today. So flip through, check your own ideas against what we have gathered (maybe ask for some honest advice from a friend) and decide for yourself whether going to the office party dressed as a sexy sriracha bottle or giant leg of prosciutto is really such a good idea.

Because yeah, dude. The hat? That makes it so much less insensitive.

This is just ridiculous because everyone knows that strawberries have tiny, dainty little hands, not such freakishly oversized ones.

This Lucky Charms costume should come with a sign that says “PUNCH ME DIRECTLY IN THE FACE”

In case you can’t read it, the writing on this keg costume says “Tap This.” ‘Nuff said.

The problem here is, after you eat her, you’re just hungry again an hour later.

This is supposed to be a broccoli costume. I have two problems with it.

1) This is supposed to be a broccoli costume.

2) This person has apparently never seen broccoli outside of an impressionist painting.

Wait, I also have a third problem? What happens when you put your arms down? Then aren’t you just a weird girl in a green leotard, afro and frilled cuffs? Think, people.

I don’t know exactly why I find this costume so sad. She’s a single lady. She’s an egg. She seems to be having a good time. And there’s probably even an over-easy joke in here somewhere…

…but then her boyfriend Chad shows up, wearing some kind of meat serape, and now, somehow, the costume is even sadder.

(Yes, I know Chad is supposed to be bacon. I just really wanted to use the phrase “meat serape.”)

You go trolling for skank in this costume, you deserve every venereal disease you get.

Gotta say it. Best. Costume. Ever.