The 56 Things You’ll Likely Overhear At Philly Tech Week

From “Glassholes” to “Is that Wil Wheaton?” to “I’m a mobile app developer.” Collect them all!

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More than 20,000 people are expected to attend more than 140 events at next week’s Philly Tech Week. AT&T and Chevrolet are the big named sponsors and all the big, local players in tech, finance and entrepreneurism are expected to participate. Are you going? If so, here’s what you’ll likely overhear:

  1. “What’s the Wi-Fi code for this place?”
  2. “Is that Wil Wheaton?”
  3. “I’m a mobile app developer.”
  4. “Haha! Windows? Haha!”
  5. “Yes, it’s a Blackberry. You got a problem with that?”
  6. “Someone just re-tweeted something I tweeted!”
  7. “I think Philly’s the new Silicon Alley.” (A variation on this is heard in every city doing a Tech Week.)
  8. “New York is only 90 miles away.”
  9. “Yes, it’s a Microsoft Surface. You got a problem with that?”
  10. “Facebook? Really?”
  11. “Why is everyone here 20 years younger than me?”
  12. “We’re looking to incorporate private cloud services with a hybrid future in mind and make sure future integration/interoperability is possible. Hey, are you as wasted as I am?”
  13. “That Kopelman guy sure is good looking, isn’t he?”
  14.  “A cash bar? Those Technical.ly Philly guys are such cheap bastards.”
  15. “I know. 1 exabyte! Can you believe it?”
  16. “I have a friend whose cousin’s husband plays softball with one of the producers of Shark Tank so I may get a shot …”
  17. “Here’s the idea, ready?  3D-printed blunts!  I know, sweet. Want to invest?”
  18. “How do you say that in Mandarin?”
  19. “When is this over? My Minecraft meetup starts in an hour.”
  20. “Is that a guy or a girl?”
  21. “Yeah, my kid could’ve gone to Penn, but he didn’t want to stay in Philly. So he’s at Millersville.”
  22. “You know, I recently read a Gartner survey and it said …”
  23. “It’s really cool, but I just don’t know how to monetize it.”
  24. “My girlfriend’s name? Cortana.”
  25. “I’m a mobile app developer”
  26. “Can someone 3D me print a beer already?”
  27. “82 tech people in this room and we still can’t get the damn projector to work.”
  28. “My favorite actor? Benedict Cumberbatch of course.”
  29. “Hey, let’s connect on LinkedIn!”
  30. “Psst … there’s a Chevy guy out there offering deals on Silverados. Wonder why?”
  31. “That Tech Girl Talk session? Seems pretty hot.”
  32. “Hey Mayor Nutter – what’s the Pope really like?”
  33. “No, I’m not kidding. The kid got accepted to every Ivy League college. Every one.”
  34. “Haha. Glasshole. Haha.”
  35. “Does Kopelman have to look so young? Geez.”
  36. “It’s called the Internet of Everything. Everything man, everything!”
  37. “I’m currently in transition.”
  38. “What’s that smell?”
  39.  “My favorite episode was the one with The Battle of the Blackwater. That explosion was killer!”
  40. “That guy looks nothing like his photo.”
  41. “Isn’t going to ‘Baseball Hack Day‘ the same as going to a Phillies game?”
  42. “ATT&T the main sponsor? Oh, that’s why my calls keep getting dropped in here.”
  43. “Sure that Penn kid may be super smart, but MY kid’s got great SOCIAL skills!”
  44. “I like turtles.”
  45. “Wait … I’m not in Austin?”
  46. “Boy, that Gene Marks sure is smart. And good looking like Kopelman, too.”
  47. “Dude, I bought this with bitcoins!”
  48. “I run a startup looking for financing.”
  49. “Hey man, email is soooo dead.”
  50. “Yes, Gwyneth Paltrow DOES work harder than a 9-5 mom. She was great in Iron Man, too.”
  51. “I bartend at night.”
  52. “I’m a mobile app developer. Yes, it seems like there are a few others here.”
  53. “Wait … Kopelman is HOW rich? Geez.”
  54. “Is someone going to throw up on Lady Gaga here?”
  55. “When’s happy hour for God sakes?”
  56. “A business coach? What exactly is that anyway?”

Did I miss anything? You can tell me in person at my session, “The Biggest Technology Trends in 2014,” on April 11th! See you there!

Follow @GeneMarks on Twitter.


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