Lisa Scottoline Shovels Horse Poop

And then watches Meet the Press. Here, the prolific author of of Don’t Go and 19 others (in 20 years!) tells us how she likes her tequila and makes predictions for the 2013 Phillies.

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My name is … Lisa Scottoline. It’s extremely Italian. And rhymes with “scallopini.”

I am a … mom.

I live in … the suburbs, on a farm.

On Sunday mornings, I … muck stalls, shovel horse poop, and then go watch Meet the Press.

My favorite horse … is Buddy the Pony. I’ve had him for 15 years. He’s a wonderful animal.

If offered a free trip to Mars … I wouldn’t go. I love being on the farm. Mars does not appeal to me in the least.

My standard cocktail order … is a margarita. Patrón Silver. Rocks. Salt. It’s so delicious.

When I was 16 … I had braces and glasses and no dates.

When I was 21 … I had glasses and no dates.

I quit my day job … a year after my second book was published. That’s when I could finally afford to do that, but I still wasn’t making a
living wage.

If you want to take me out to dinner … I’ll go. Someplace with eggplant parm.

What this city really needs is … more respect. Philadelphia is perfect. I have never lived anywhere else. And I never want to. I wish Philadelphians realized how great it is.

The prettiest place in Philadelphia … is any of those big cobblestone streets in Old City. I love every marble stoop. I love every soft orange facade, the brick in the Colonial part. I’ve written 20 novels, all set in Philadelphia. It’s like nowhere else.

My daughter is always telling me … to follow the recipe. It’s really true.

I’m always telling my daughter … to not stress about not following the recipe.

When I want to relax … I read.

If you come to my house for dinner … please don’t dress up. And don’t mind it when the dogs jump up on you. I train my dogs to jump up on you. It’s not going to work if you’re not going to deal with this. I love my dogs.

The farthest I’ve been from Philadelphia … is Australia. For a country that has such a carefree reputation, they take their reading very seriously.

On an average day … I write 2,000 words.

My best subject at Lower Merion High was … English. For my first two books, I would go back to school, and the teachers would grade me on them. My worst subject was trig. Anything involving numbers, I can’t do. At all.

One day, I would like to write … a children’s book.

This year, the Phillies … will win the World Series. Perhaps. It could happen. The Eagles were so sad, anyway.

If I ever remarry … shoot me. Stop me. Remind me.