Today’s Daily Examiner quip comes courtesy of Louis DeNaples, who’s being charged with perjury in connection with a federal corruption investigation into former mayor John Street. When DeNaples was testifying in front of the Gaming Control Board in 2006, he was asked whether he had given money to Ron White for Street’s campaign. DeNaples played dumb in his response. Very dumb:

“To me, black people all look alike.”

Street wouldn’t recognize big donor [DN] [via]

Rich Hoffman’s story in the Daily News today about NHL commissioner Gary Bettman’s 15-year anniversary party is a little misleading. Although Bettman is featured in the headline (and in an odd-looking photo), the bulk of the story is a conversation with Flyers/Sixers chairman and warmonger Ed Snider, whose quotes about the NHL’s relationship with another giant sports media conglomerate seem to have been taken after he chugged a blender full of Ripped Fuel:

“You can’t measure our success whether or not we’re on ESPN,” Snider said. “Screw ESPN. Most of our television is local and we do very well in our local markets.
 
“We could have gone to ESPN. They offered us bupkus. Then they acted like they had us over a barrel, that we had no place else to go. I never liked the way they treated us …”

And then Ed Snider tore off his shirt and began eating Hoffman’s tape recorder.

For the NHL, Bettman has money in the bank [Daily News]

Yesterday, Gov. Ed Rendell lambasted Philadelphia’s City Council over its refusal to let two casinos start building. According to the Metro, Rendell called them a “City Council with no guts that can be extorted by community groups.”

Of course, the groups in question could be any “community” groups — you know, like Hugs for Puppies. But the implication is that Rendell was referring to the browbeating superheroes of Casino-Free Philadelphia. They, in turn, issued this statement via e-mail about the Guv: (more…)

Soccer by 2010?: State officials have arranged $45 million for a professional soccer stadium to be built along the city’s waterfront. The Sons of Ben have been heard. [Inquirer]

A Jersey man, a nun, and porn: A 42-year-old man from Hamilton was caught sneaking into a local church at night to look at pornography on a nun’s computer. Tremendous. [Inquirer]

(more…)

Wing Bowl attendees won’t be able to slam brown-bag beers before they stumble into the Wachovia Center at 5 a.m. tomorrow morning. In an effort to lessen the chaos, police and city officials have promised to “crack down” on the pre-event tailgaiting that has been as important to this 15-year tradition as cascading vomit and latent misogyny. (more…)

TASTE DAILY: Suburban dad next Wing Bowl champ?

GOOD LIFE DAILY: Look to this West Chester company for shelves that float above the rest

TRAVEL: Head to the West Indies for a secret getaway

Alycia bites back: Yesterday, ousted anchorprincess Alycia Lane filed a writ of summons against former employer CBS 3. Lane’s attorney, Paul Rosen, is seeking all of the information CBS 3 used in coming to its decision to can her, including the piles of gossip pages that allege she’s, among other things, a melodramatic wacko. [Mighty Dan Gross]

Smoky flight: An American Airlines flight headed to PHL from Puerto Rico had to make an emergency landing due to smoke in the cockpit. All the passengers thought they were surely doomed, and some started writing farewell letters to loved ones. [CBS 3]

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Today’s Daily Examiner quip comes courtesy of the City Paper’s “How We Work” issue, which featured snippet of what the daily grind is like for Tanya Pham, a nocturnal animal keeper at the Philadelphia Zoo. (Real job title!) It was given the “Goriest Job” title by CP editors, and this sentence does an admirable job of proving it:

If you think the fun stops at feeding, don’t discount the bliss that is scrubbing leftover blood and dung off the floor, obtaining fresh blood and injecting medicines into large insects, which are then hand-fed to any ailing animals.

How We Work [City Paper]

Remember just a few weeks ago when blogger Depressed Fan was granted an interview with new Sixers GM Ed Stefanski? Well, congratulations, Philly sports geeks, you can expect more of that in the near future. (more…)

Waiting for Superman: Chief Ramsey’s new crime-fighting plan for ‘08 reveals lofty goals: 100 fewer murders, 200 more cops. Police in cushy locations should be prepared to spend more late nights in the ‘hood. [Inquirer]

Starr/Vetri mashup?: Foobooz is reporting a rumor that Stephen Starr may have something cooking with Marc Vetri. Starr might want to sell Striped Bass to Vetri or … perhaps they’ll join forces at Washington Square. [Foobooz]

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