Bride-to-be Blogger Stephanie: Feeling a Little Overwhelmed With Wedding Planning
It’s official: I’ve reached bridal stressed status—like, way stressed. My brain is tired, my body exhausted. We have less than two months to go, and there has been onslaught of decisions to make—both trivial and utterly significant.
One of the more pressing items on the agenda has been where on earth Pat and I are going to live. Pat and I have been doing long-distance now for nearly three years—three challenging, telling years. We are more than ecstatic to finally live together. But where? It looks like it’s going to be D.C. due to his job that neither of us thinks he should give up. But in the meantime, I may have to give up mine; my job that I really like. I will also have to leave all of my friends, family, and perhaps, most importantly, my twin sister. I’ve had a lot of trouble coming to terms with it. I’m worried about starting over; the uncertainty is daunting.
But over the weekend, I decided I simply have to give it a try. So we spent our Sunday and Memorial Day touring 20 properties in D.C. There were two standouts, and we were notified the very next day that if we didn’t make an offer on our top choice, we were going to lose it, as there was already an offer on the table. We scrambled to get everything together; I learned a whole new language in the process—contingencies, appraisals, liens—and feel like I grew up/aged 10 years in the process. We thought we had more time when the other offer fell through, but just as we were about to put in ours, we were notified that another offer was accepted. Disappointment, frustration, relief, confusion, fear of not finding a place as great, hope for finding a place even better, were the emotions that engulfed us all at the same time.
So that’s happening.
And then there’s deciding on the design and copy for the menu cards, ceremony programs, and place cards; there’s the flower girl shoes and accessories; there’s the groomsmen gifts; there’s the custom ceremony that we have yet to create; there’s the welcome bags; there’s the honeymoon that we have yet to book—all of which sounds like I’ve been sitting around twiddling my thumbs. Yet last week was packed with wedding appointments: the cake tasting, a meeting with the band, hair trial number two, the jewelry search, and my first dress fitting.
And my first dress fitting didn’t go so smoothly. I was so thrilled to head back to La Bella Moda; I simply couldn’t wait to try on my dress again. When I arrived, the shop was swamped, and there was a tangible and pervasive sense of tension. They brought me back to the dressing room, I got undressed, and seamstress Maria helped me into my gown. I breathed a big sigh of relief when I was able to relatively easily shimmy into my dress, whereas when I last tried on the dress in February, it was very tight. She had let out the seams on each side of my hips, and it was feeling far more comfortable.
I brought along my bridesmaid Chrissy for moral support, and it was her first time seeing the dress. Her reaction: “It’s like it was made for you.” This made me instantly happier. She loved it. But when I went and stood before the mirror (dressing room was mirror-less), my spirits sunk a bit.
While letting out the dress was ultimately the best decision, it also created problems elsewhere on the dress. It now needs to be taken in above the hips. The lining/interior fabric is also loose and gapping in both the front and back, which required some skillful maneuvering by Maria to get her pins within it.
Whether it was the temperature of the room, the brewing anxiety, or the four layers that comprise my dress, I became profusely hot. I’m actually worried the dress and all its layers is the primary contributor, which I’m concerned might manifest itself on the wedding day. Philly brides, did any of you have trouble with this by any chance? My bridesmaid Chrissy pointed out how she was the only one who didn’t seem to be fazed by the cold temperatures at her October outdoor wedding, likely due to her dress.
To cap it off, my wedding planner was planning on meeting me at the appointment and bringing jewelry options for me to try with the dress, yet miscommunication led her to drive to Feasterville rather than Conshohocken. There was also some post-appointment panic regarding my veil and sash possibly being ordered in the wrong colors, but all has seemingly been rectified. (Though I guess I won’t really know until my veil comes in next month.)
I’m looking forward to fitting number two. It could only get better, right? And of course, that’s what fittings are for—to solve the problems, to tailor the dress specifically to you. It’s just kind of a disconcerting process. The finished product isn’t ready yet, and at the moment, it’s a very much work-in-progress—with only a few weeks to go until the wedding.
So, while we continue to try to find a property in D.C., I’m trying to get to each of the tasks left on the never-ending checklist—while I also prepare for my company’s international sales meeting and my presentations next week. I’m stressed, way stressed. And I don’t know about you guys, but one of my least favorite responses to “I’m stressed” (which I try to only mention if someone asks, “How are you?” in the meaningful, I-want-to-know way, not the obligatory, I’m-just-asking-because-I-have-to way) is “Everything’s going to be okay,” or “Everything’s going to work out.”
For me, I’m not worried that the programs are going to be ruined or that the place cards aren’t going to get produced. I’m worried about how I’m going to get those tasks done amidst everything else. I’m worried about sleep deprivation and sanity along the way.
But it’s time to push through, with my eye on the prize. The day is going to be perfect. While I hope and pray the details that I’ve spend the last year and half of my life planning go off without a hitch, I’m marrying the man I want to spend the rest of my life with, with my family and friends there to celebrate us. I’m so unbelievably lucky.
I absolutely can’t wait until it’s here—literally (no more planning)! But we’re so, so close, and dreaming about the actual day—Pat waiting at the top of the aisle, my family and friends dancing into the night, stepping into my sure-to-be perfect dress and looking in the mirror for the first time—inevitably incites my eyes to tear up because I know how supremely happy I will be.
How have you survived the most stressful times of your wedding planning? I could really use some tips!
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