Finding love is hard. Finding love in Philly is harder. Finding love in Philly on the Internet? There has to be a better way.
With this in mind and Valentine’s Day on the horizon, we’re once again giving some Missed Connections a gentle nudge in the right direction.
“We crossed paths a few times. I was with kids, you were alone. I wanted so much to talk with you. You were wearing a red blazer, flowing shoulder-length light brown hair and eyes that speak.” The Art Museum
Is this a romantic single dad struggling to find love while introducing his children to the arts? Or a creep checking out women while his wife is in the gift shop? I can’t be sure, Red Blazer, but I cleaned up his punctuation and sent him your way — love is a gamble.
“We talked for a lot of the show Friday. I lost you at the end of the night without getting your number. You weren’t from here. I thought we had a connection. I had a sweatshirt with an elephant on it.” The Fillmore
Only in Fishtown could a guy in an elephant sweatshirt expect to get laid. We’re rooting for you, buddy.
“I still can’t believe that people would try scrapping someone’s bike in broad daylight. Can I buy you a drink? Or at least buy myself a drink, and leave a nice tip?” Dockside Brewery
Introducing West Philly’s version of the meet-cute: Girl chases thieves away from boy’s bike, boy halfheartedly offers to buy her a craft beer on Craigslist. Aw.
“I completely missed my opportunity! You’re an exchange student traveling home with a friend. We chatted only momentarily before the flight. You waved in customs when you caught me looking at you.” London to Philly, PHL
Guys. At the end of this movie, Hugh Grant makes out with the messy foul-mouthed girl who can’t keep her hands out of the pastry cart. I need you to fucking concentrate and make this happen for me.
“Today you were working at the candy island kiosk while I was walking my laps at the mall. You offered me a sample. I smiled and said, ‘No, thank you.’ Second time around you offered me a sample again. I smiled and said, ‘No no no, I’m on a very strict diet.’ We both laughed. Third time we just smiled at each other as I passed by.” Neshaminy Mall
One more lap! One more lap!
“You were at the corner of the bar chain smoking, eating chips and drinking the biggest cup of coffee I’ve ever seen. It was destructive as fuck and you were adorable. If you remember the long-haired dude repeatedly making eye contact with you, send me a message.” Center City
I don’t know, lady — this guys seems a little judgmental. You? You sound great though. Let’s hang out.
“Nice chatting at the shop the other day. Never realized we both loved cats, rasta, and DIY auto mechanics.” Grindcore House
Wouldn’t even be the strangest hook-up to shake out of Grindcore House. Not even close.
“Saw you at TLA. You had blonde hair and we talked briefly because you bumped in to me on the way to the bathroom. You were wearing green and you mentioned how the band sounded like a cat.” South Street
People have hooked up on South Street over far less. Do it.
“You were with a group of firefighters today at the Fresh Grocer. You and your crew chatted it up with me at the shredded cheese. I’m not usually taken by a man like this but you looked like you could carry me up or down a flight of stairs.” Temple University Fresh Grocer
See you never, Whole Foods.
“This is probably ridiculous and unlikely to work, but I exchanged smiles with a really handsome man who was working at Mapes in Ardmore today. You kind of look like Gerard Butler or Russell Crowe! Anyway, you were using a piece of heavy machinery outside in the lot.” Rittenhouse Place
I’m not sure if this is Main Line mom porn or an earnest Missed Connection. Either way, totally into it.
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Source URL: https://www.phillymag.com/news/2016/02/10/philadelphia-missed-connections/
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