The Gayest Cities in America

Warning: The Advocate's list may surprise/anger you.

The Advocate‘s trying to shake things up with their just-released Gayest Cities in America, 2013 list. Obvies like Los Angeles and New York are no where to be found. Instead, the writers looked for the “in-between,” putting emphasis on cities that made “the biggest legislative and political developments” for LGBTers, and a host of other, mostly funny criteria — for instance, cities with “Concerts by Scissor Sisters, Uh Huh Her, Girl in a Coma, and cast of Glee” get “1 point for each stop since 2009” and places with “Roller Derby” get “1 point for each team.”

Some surprises?:

  • Colorado Springs (I don’t even know what that is.)
  • Oakland (that’s right, Oakland, not San Francisco.)
  • Atlanta (Not a huge surprise, actually, but you know that rich bitch NeNe Leakes boosted this by millions of points.)
  • Springfield (not the one in Illinois — though that would be a little surprising, too — but Massachusetts)

Biggest surprise of all?:

  • Philly’s not on the list. We don’t even get an honorable mention! Really, The Advocate? Sure, we’re dragging our ass on marriage equality, but ever hear of Brian Sims or Dan Anders? Last I heard they were sitting pretty in their newly elected government seats. What about the Philly Roller Girls? There are at least five teams in that league. Been to one of our (multiple) pride celebrations? I know you’re trying to shock us with your Spokanes and Eugenes, but come on! We’re as gay as it gets.