NEW FAVORITE THING: The Aaron Schock Gay Parody Twitter
You’re working some fierce side-eye there, Mr. Schock.
If you’re in mourning that the severely homophobic (and, might I add, severely hot) Republican congressman Aaron Schock’s Instagram account was locked down after being “outed” by journalist Itay Hod, then you’re in luck. There’s a rather humorous and oh-so-juicy parody replacement on Twitter: @GayRepSchock.
With a bio that reads, “I’m not gay, I’m FABULOUS,” a shirtless profile pic from Schock’s now infamous Men’s Health photo shoot, and hashtags with the likes of #DontTellBoehner, #TeamSchocker, and #TheseABS, the account is a humorous reminder that Schock’s speculated sexuality is all the more hypocritical given his extreme anti-gay voting record.
Here’s a taste of some of Gay Aaron Shock‘s tweets:
Introducing legislation to declare my abs a national monument.
— Gay Aaron Schock (@GayRepSchock) January 15, 2014
Roommate shower share time is my way to help conserve energy and stop #globalwarming #nohomo
— Gay Aaron Schock (@GayRepSchock) January 13, 2014
Don’t care if you dislike #GovChristie — he’s the BEST cuddle buddy. Sorry #MarcusBachmann you’re a close 2nd, but I live for your giggles
— Gay Aaron Schock (@GayRepSchock) January 10, 2014
@electadam my snuggles heal veterans
— Gay Aaron Schock (@GayRepSchock) January 15, 2014
As much as many of us would love to share a shower with Aaron Schock and be his “cuddle buddy,” you have to ask yourself: would I really want to associate with someone who, in “real life,” is so disingenuously homophobic?
Then again, after taking one look at his abs, perhaps it wouldn’t be so bad to be one of those, to use @GayRepSchock’s hashtags, #ThingsThatOffendLiberals.
