Dear G Philly: Answering Reader Questions

G Philly has received a lot of great feedback from readers since launching two short months ago. We wanted to give you the opportunity to ask us questions about anything and everything related to LGBT life in the region.

Looking for a great date night spot that isn’t in the Gayborhood? Want the scoop on a gay-owned business? Need to know how to tell your partner it’s kaput? G Philly would like to hear from you.

We’ll answer your questions about sex, relationships, culture, travel and more. And if we don’t know the answer, we’ll track down an expert who does. Just ask. We’ll tell.

I’ve been invited to a holiday party…by my ex. We’re on good terms, but my current partner isn’t pleased about attending this event – the two of them do not get along. Should I go to the party alone? Or skip it?

Happy horror-days! With the holidays upon us (we’ve already received more party invitations than you can shake a blog at) it’s inevitable that we’ll all run into a little drama around the dreidel or punch bowl. Since we don’t know exactly why your current partner and ex are frenemies (jealousy, perhaps?) it’s might be time to ask yourself if attending this soiree is worth the drama it will most certainly cause your current squeeze.

If you always attend your ex’s party, then it might be worth sharing the importance of doing so with your current partner, assuring him/her that it’s harmless (because it’s harmless, right?). If this is a first, then perhaps sit down and decide whether it’s time to cut the ties that bind. While it’s certainly laudable keeping things civil with exes, it’s not always worth creating chaos with your current relationship – assuming your partner has a reason to be concerned. Then again, attending the party together may be a great way to heal old scars and prove that the past is in the past.

Bottom line: Figure out why your partner has a problem attending the party. And then decide on whether you want to show civility toward him/her – or your ex. This decision will definitely dictate your future (or not) together.

I just started dating someone new and we’re taking it slow. Do I have to buy him a Christmas present? If so, what gift is appropriate? I don’t want to come on too strong. I also don’t want to seem cheap. He likes nice things.

Whatever you do, don’t overlook the holidays. Tis the season to show affection for folks (whether we like it or not) by way of presents. And since it sounds like you like him, then he should be no exception, right?

There are a few easy ways to give a gift without seeming over the top (or worse) cheap. Be creative. Instead of spending lots of money on something he may or may not even like (you don’t know him that well yet) consider doing something together. Surprise him with a holiday brunch or take him on a surprise day trip out of town to a winery or museum. Or pick up a favorite book or music selection that you’ve always enjoyed and share it with him. Not only will it let him know more about you, but it will come across as sentimental and thoughtful without trying so hard.

And if your new love interest is really just a label whore who would prefer Prada to engaging gifts such as these, then you’ll know that in time for next year…if you make it that long.

Got a question for G Philly? Send it to nmcdonald@phillymag.com.