Lululemon’s Happy Hatha Pants Are Utterly Hideous

Please, Lulu, stick with what you're good at: awesome-butt yoga pants.

Dear Lululemon,

You make a lot of really cute things, like pants that make my butt look awesome and a gym bag that I may or may not want to use as a purse every now and then. But this time, with those Happy Hatha Crop pants, you’ve swung and missed. They’re ugly—like, really ugly. Sorry.

I’m not exactly sure where and how the resurgence of Aladdin-like legwear came to be in the fashion world, but it’s a trend I’d rather leave to models on the runway; it should absolutely never make an appearance in a yoga class. As I’m not the authority on all-things style, I asked our fashion editor, Emily Goulet, what she thought of your creation: “If you were leggy, super-thin, with model hair and model skin, and you had on a fabulous jacket, fringed scarf and a super-expensive studded bag, then you could wear them,” she said. “Otherwise, no.”

Listen, I’m sure your pants are comfortable. If there’s one thing Lulu consistently hits out of the ballpark, it’s comfort. Why else do you think we ladies wear your awesome-butt yoga pants to happy hour? (I mean, besides the obvious awesome-butt effect and utter laziness after yoga.) But I draw the line at front- and backside sagginess. Not to be crude, but, um, the Happy pants kinda make your model look like she has a dirty diaper. And no, the pockets and pleats don’t help. (Also? Shame on you for charging $88 for something so grotesque.)

As 99 percent of us don’t look like Gisele, I kindly request that you discontinue these harem-style jodhpurs. Please. Just give me back my awesome-butt pants.