Uh, Did You Know There’s a Naked Trail Run in the Poconos?

Do we think they wear shoes for this race? | Shutterstock

Do we think they wear shoes for this race? | Shutterstock

Guys, I feel as if I’ve let you down. I realized yesterday that I have failed in my duty as Unofficial Official Philly-Area Race Announcer because I totally missed the fact that late last month, there was a naked trail run in the Poconos. I know. I’m really, really sorry.

But look at it this way: I’ve now given you nearly a year’s advance notice for the 2015 Bouncing Buns Clothing Optional 7K Trail Run, date TBD, at nudist vacation destination Sunny Rest Resort in Palmerton, PA. And yes, that is the race’s real name.

It’s not the only naked fitness event in our area, of course. We also have the annual Philly Naked Bike Ride (which, by the way, will be on September 6th this year) that fetches gaggles of cyclists who ride through Center City sans clothing.

Like the Naked Ride, this race encourages participation by clothed (or partially clothed) runners, too. It includes a few on-road detours, but most of the course is on wooded trails on the resort’s property. The race entry fee includes a day pass to the resort and access to its amenities, including a pool, hot tub, volleyball and tennis courts, a poolside bar called Streaker’s, and the resort’s on-premises night club. According to the race website, “Clothing may be worn anywhere except in pool and hot tub.”

And in the ultimate twist of irony, all race participants get a race shirt when they sign up. I’ll let that one sink in.

In case you’re wondering how you might place in this race, you can check out the results from this year’s race. The 2014 winner, a 33-year-old guy named Casey K. (Note: The race doesn’t publish last names on the results sheet.), trucked the 4.35-mile race with a finish time of 27:47 and an average pace of 6:23 per mile. The first female finisher, Nadalie S., came in fourth overall, with a finish time of 29:39, pacing at 6:49 per mile.

No word yet on when next year’s Bouncing Buns Run will be, however the past four years’ races have been held near the end of June, so that seems like a pretty clear hint. But you can bet your first child that I will be on top of this like … well, like someone who’s really sorry she missed the memo this year. I am so ashamed.

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