7 Presents Philadelphia Should’ve Given Pope Francis

Can you believe the mayor of Philadelphia went to the Vatican and gave the Pope a freaking football jersey?

Pope Francis actually got jerseys of six Philadelphia sports teams: The four major sports, a Union jersey — which is at least a sport that’s popular in both Italy and the former Jorge Mario Bergoglio’s native Argentina — and the St. Joe’s Prep football jersey above. Yes, the Pope now owns a Phillies jersey; he can dress like Macklemore.

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WATCH: The Sixers’ Futility in One GIF

So! Our beloved pro basketball franchise — which already holds the record for futility in a standard 82-game season, at 9-73 — is now one loss away from tying the all-time record for futility in consecutive games. Are you excited, Philadelphia?!

Last night, the Spurs toyed with the Sixers for a bit before pulling away for a 113-91 win. It was the 25th straight loss for the 76ers, one away from the Cavaliers’ 26-loss streak in the 2010-11 season.

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Everyone Says Philly Is a Great Basketball Town

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Philadelphia’s a great basketball town.

You’ll hear this a lot, and it makes sense. The city has a rich basketball tradition. After being invented in Springfield, basketball spread to other east-coast cities, and eventually the Philadelphia SPHAs were one of the top teams. The Sixers may be down now, but they’ve had some of the biggest superstars in NBA history: Wilt Chamberlain, Julius Erving, Charles Barkley. More recently, the Sixers had Allen Iverson, the most exciting, interesting player of the post-Michael Jordan NBA.

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Sixers Not Even Pretending to Care About This Season Anymore

If you go to the Sixers homepage, this is what greets you:

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That’s right: Buy tickets next year! The video features the three people with the franchise we know will be around next November: Coach Brown, Michael Carter-Williams, and Nerlens Noel. Everybody else is absent. Which is probably as it should be, given that the team’s losing streak is now at 22 games.
Blech. The team had better have a great draft.

Sixers Lose Team-Record 21st Straight, Now Favored for Longest NBA Losing Streak Ever

Jan 6, 2014; Philadelphia, PA, USA; Philadelphia 76ers head coach Brett Brown during the first quarter against the Minnesota Timberwolves at the Wells Fargo Center. The Timberwolves defeated the Sixers 126-95. Mandatory Credit: Howard Smith-USA TODAY Sports

Jan 6, 2014; Philadelphia, PA, USA; Philadelphia 76ers head coach Brett Brown during the first quarter against the Minnesota Timberwolves at the Wells Fargo Center. The Timberwolves defeated the Sixers 126-95. Photo | Howard Smith-USA TODAY Sports

Well! The Sixers’ losing streak is now such an inevitability that the team’s 21st straight loss registered barely a blip. The Sixers were actually in the game against the Pacers — trailing by just three, 88-85, with two minutes left in the fourth — but Indiana pulled away for a 99-90 win.

The Sixers are now 15-52 (which is still better than Milwaukee’s 13-54). According to ESPN stats whiz Kevin Pelton, the Sixers are now more-than-likely to tie Cleveland’s NBA record 26-game losing streak.

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Andrew Bynum Finds New Ways Not to Play in Philly

Remember when the Sixers traded for All-Star center Andrew Bynum, who proceeded never to play a game for the team—though he had some great moments with his hair, and also a less-glorious moment of bowling—ruining the careers of pretty much everybody involved with that decision, leading to this year’s “let’s just blow it up, win just enough to avoid our own NBA record for losses, and try to grab a top draft pick” disaster-slash-process?

Bynum’s with the Indiana Pacers now. And he still won’t play in Philly:

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How Bad Are the Sixers? They Can’t Even Win Their Fans Free Big Macs.

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The Sixers have essentially become the Washington Generals. Last night, they lost for the 18th straight time — and 14th straight time at home. The 115-98 loss to the Sacramento Kings puts them at 15-49, 2 games ahead of Milwaukee for the worst record in the NBA and an astounding 32 games back in the conference.

But they’re trying. They’re trying to appease the fans. They’re trying to get them Big Macs.

The end of last night’s Sixers game was probably my favorite ending to a Sixers game this season. Fans get free Big Macs the next day if the team hits 100 points; the Sixers had 98 with just a few seconds left.

Here’s what happened.

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The Ultimate Philadelphia Klout Ranking

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Klout, Inc. was founded in San Francisco in 2009. It measures online influence by using data from Twitter, Facebook, Google+, Instagram, WordPress and a bunch of other social media platforms. Each user is assigned a Klout score on a scale from one to 100. The higher your score, the more influence you are said to have online.

Many Internet aficionados are skeptical or downright dismissive of Kloutjoin them at your own risk. Marketers and major companies take the very basic web analytic very seriously.

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