Check Out This Amazing Block by Nerlens Noel

There isn’t much to celebrate about the Sixers this year. They’re 2-22, they blew an 18-point fourth quarter lead on Saturday and they waived a guy from St. Joe’s to sign a dude from Turkey. (On the plus side, Furkan Aldemir has a good name.) While the plan may help the Sixers be watchable in future seasons, currently Sixers games are pretty grim.

But if you struggled through last night’s blowout loss to the Celtics, you at least got to see an incredible block by Nerlens Noel on Jared Sullinger. It was so good, color commentator Malik Rose even uses an acronym (“sugar honey iced tea”) to convey a word you’re not supposed to say on TV (shit) after the play.

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Sixers Acquire Draft Pick They Can Use if the NBA Still Exists in 2020

While NBA players may all be wearing exosuits like in that Jonathan Lethem short story by the time they can use it, the Sixers made a trade yesterday to acquire a draft pick in 2020. Heck, let’s hope the NBA still exists then!

The Sixers traded Brandon Davies to the Brooklyn Nets for Andrei Kirilenko, the right to swap second-round picks in 2018 and a 2020 second-rounder. The Sixers also got cash. More assets for Hinkie! Won’t you be excited when the Sixers make that extra second round pick in 2020, if you’re still alive then?

So why no mention of Kirilenko?

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The Best Thing That Happened This Week

Philadelphia 76ers center Drew Gordon, left, forward JaKarr Sampson (9), forward Jerami Grant (39) and guard Hollis Thompson watch from the bench in the fourth quarter.

Philadelphia 76ers center Drew Gordon, left, forward JaKarr Sampson (9), forward Jerami Grant (39) and guard Hollis Thompson watch from the bench in the fourth quarter.

Shut up. Sure, it was ugly right from the start, when the teams lined up the wrong way. All those missed three-pointers. That second quarter! Again with the passes to the refs! But somehow they held it together, right up until the end. For almost a quarter of the Sixers’ roster — Nerlens Noel, K.J. McDaniels, Jerami Grant and JaKarr Sampson — it was the first NBA win they ever played in. And yeah, you don’t want to show it too much when you’re 1-and-17, but it felt good.

Plus they warded off that “All-Time Worst Start” tag. Whew.

Now get back to what you do best.

Sixers Actually Win Game

The Philadelphia 76ers have hurt their chances at the No. 1 overall draft pick for the first time this season. After losing their first 17 games of the season, the 76ers won their first on Wednesday night. The win means the Sixers avoid tying the Nets for the worst start in NBA history. It’s the little things.

Michael Carter-Williams led the way for the Sixers in their 85-77 win over the Minnesota Timberwolves with 20 points, 9 rebounds and 9 assists. But it was K.J. McDaniels whose name will be forever etched into the Sixers records books: His three-pointer with two minutes left gave the Sixers the lead for good.

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Does Anybody Care if the Sixers Are Tanking?

We know that reader polls are highly unscientific, but oh well: An audience poll of 94WIP listeners found that Philadelphians are more concerned with the losing ways of the Phillies and the Flyers than they are with the Sixers — who, it should be noted, stand to set an NBA record for most season-opening losses this week.

Just 7 percent of respondents said that they’re most upset with the Sixers for losing. The Phillies topped the list, with 63 percent of respondents upset with them.
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It Was a Miserable Night for Philadelphia Sports

Philadelphia Flyers goalie Steve Mason (35) reacts against the New York Rangers during the first period at Madison Square Garden on November 19, 2014.

Philadelphia Flyers goalie Steve Mason (35) reacts against the New York Rangers during the first period at Madison Square Garden on November 19, 2014.

It was not a good night to be a Philadelphia sports fan.

First off, the Sixers lost. That’s not necessarily news, but this was a game they might have been able to win! They led the hated Celtics by as many as nine points in the first quarter, but eventually lost 101-90. The record for most losses to start a season is 18. The Sixers are 0-11.

Meanwhile, Tony Wroten fired back at Suns guard Eric Bledsoe, who said the University of Kentucky basketball team would beat the Sixers this year. I see no reason we can’t make this exhibition happen — it might be a chance for the 76ers to actually get a win.

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The Sixers Are Making Deadspin Really Angry

Philadelphia 76ers' Nerlens Noel, left, holds his head after scrambling for a ball against Houston Rockets' Trevor Ariza, right, in the second half of an NBA basketball game Friday, Nov. 14, 2014, in Houston. The Rockets won 88-87.(AP Photo/Pat Sullivan)

Philadelphia 76ers’ Nerlens Noel, left, holds his head after scrambling for a ball against Houston Rockets’ Trevor Ariza, right, in the second half of an NBA basketball game Friday, Nov. 14, 2014, in Houston. The Rockets won 88-87.(AP Photo/Pat Sullivan)

The folks at Deadspin have had it with the Sixers and their tank-job ways. We’ll give you three quotes from the piece, “The Philadelphia 76ers Are a Godless Abomination,” to convey the depth of anger — you might even share it by the end of the piece!

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The Outrage Meter for the Week Ending November 14, 2014

Although there’s been some residual anger over accused sexual assaulter Bill Cosby and the couple charged with torturing and killing a three-year-old boy, a rather heated debate over where the best veggie burger can be found in Philadelphia (talk about First World Problems), nausea brought on by the Sixers (but, really, that’s nothing new), a scuffle over stores being open on Thanksgiving, some talk about spitting in public, embarrassment for the guy who spent $82,000 on a lame proposal scheme that involved iPhones, and disappointment over LeSean McCoy’s lackluster performance, it seems that the only thing that people here are really outraged about en masse is…

…the same thing that people everywhere are outraged about: the naked ass of a fame whore who is married to one of the biggest pieces of crap in society, whether said outrage is over the mere existence of the photo, outrage over the Photoshopping of the photo, outrage over the fact that people are sharing the photo more often than the common cold, or feminist outrage at the people who are outraged at said fame whore for posing for the photo. Frankly, we’d much rather have people sharing this photo of a girl than that one.

Not-Tanking Sixers Try Really Hard, Lose by 53

USATSI_NERLENS-NOEL-sixers-photo-matthew-emmons-usa-today-940x540

Philadelphia 76ers forward Nerlens Noel during the second half against the Dallas Mavericks at American Airlines Center.

On Thursday, Michael Carter-Williams wrote an essay in The Players Tribune, essentially a new professional-athletes-only blog, about the Sixers’ struggles. In the piece, titled “Don’t Talk to Me About Tanking,” Carter-Williams says the media has been too harsh on the team.

“Nobody took the losses harder than we did,” Carter-Williams wrote. “We deserved plenty of criticism, but we all put in too much work to be treated like a joke.”

After sitting out the start of the season with a shoulder injury, Carter-Williams returned to the Sixers lineup. So here is a recap of last night’s Sixers game: The absolutely not-tanking 76ers tried really hard last night in their game against the Dallas Mavericks. They lost by 53, 123-70.

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