Philadelphia Sex Diaries: I’m a Secret Dominatrix

It started with dirty panties.

I was inspired by a friend — and Orange Is the New Black — to sell my worn underwear on Craigslist. I’m a college senior with a 3.61 GPA and two internships. I don’t exactly have time for a job, and hawking my thongs online for $30 a pop was a quick way to earn some extra cash. Before long, I discovered FetLife, a social networking site where people interested in fetishism, BDSM and other triple-X pursuits can chat with each other and post photos and videos. It’s like the kinky love child of Facebook and Reddit.

I connected with a guy — 30-something, works as a consultant — who asked me to Skype with him. The deal: 20 minutes for $50 in Amazon gift cards. I accepted, nervous and unsure of what to expect. I slipped on a bathrobe and chugged a glass of wine as I raced around my apartment, trying to find the perfect setup. The kitchen table was too formal, and the coffee table was way too low. I ultimately landed in the bedroom — which I happen to share with a roommate. She sat, wide-eyed, on her bed, just out of the camera’s reach. But the consultant was less interested in seeing me naked than I’d anticipated. Instead, he wanted to see my feet. And … my toilet.

Confused, I moved to the bathroom — could my white porcelain Kohler really be considered sexy? — and awkwardly circled my laptop around the toilet rim. He asked me to describe how I’d make him clean it with his tongue. And then he asked to watch me spit. So began my foray into the world of domination.

It’s a far cry from my otherwise vanilla life. By day, I’m the quiet girl who blushes when she participates in class. But as soon as I get home and log on, I become Paris Powell — a fierce, powerful woman who tells guys to lick her toilet, clean her shoes with their teeth and drink her urine. And who gets paid for it.

I currently have four “slaves,” all of whom I met through FetLife. Two pay me up to $100 a week; one sends me $50 every two weeks. (He’s also in college; I give him a student discount.) They have to buy me monthly gifts on Amazon, too. But I pay it forward: Each month, my slaves have to donate to a charity of my choice. For this, I send them derogatory, insulting text messages and videos of me doing things like crushing nuts with my boots. (This is what I’d do to your nuts, I say.) Sometimes it gets really weird: I once sent a man videos of me pooping. I also sold him a poop-stained thong for $45. Disgusting, I know. But when you can make money for something you do naturally, it’s hard not to milk it.

My fourth slave is the only one I’ve agreed to meet in person. He’s in his 60s, married, and a practicing psychologist in Philly. (Go figure.) Sometimes he pays me to meet him for coffee, just to talk as friends. Occasionally he pays me to come to his office and beat him to a pulp. All while his patients sit unsuspecting in the waiting room.

In the end, I don’t make nearly enough to live on. But I do make enough to have some spending money. And the work is strangely rewarding. The men tell me I make their lives better. I give them companionship, and the structure and rules they crave. (For example, they’re not allowed to eat meat on Sundays because I’m a vegetarian.) And they give me confidence, a jolt of energy in my otherwise pedestrian life. When I’m on the other side of the computer screen, I’m powerful. A goddess. A total badass. You know, one who lives on a pretty campus in a tidy apartment right next to an R.A. who has no idea that I’m on the other side of the door letting a guy in Alabama watch me take a dump for $45.

*Some names in this essay have been changed. 

» See All of Our Philadelphia Sex Diaries

La Salle University Slashing $11,600 Off Tuition

La Salle - stacks in the library

Photo by Matthew Chverchko, courtesy La Salle University

La Salle University is cutting tuition prices by 29 percent — reducing tuition from $40,400 to $28,800 for the 2017-18 school year. Students will pay the same rates they did in 2008 for the next school year. The college had previously frozen tuition for the 2016-17 school year.

“The cost of higher education continues to spiral year after year, with no end in sight,” La Salle President Colleen Hanycz said in a release. “We cannot continue to assume that this issue will fix itself someday, somehow — the tuition model for higher education is broken. La Salle is working to reshape that model so college becomes an affordable reality for students and their families.”

The university has dubbed its tuition reduction “An Affordable Path for All.” The only students that will receive a full tuition reduction of $11,600 are those paying the full share of the tuition. La Salle says 97 percent of its students receive some kind of financial aid. La Salle spokesperson Jaine Lucas says most students are getting $1,000 and $1,500 reductions in their tuition bill.

Tuition may go up in the coming years, but it will rise off the $28,800 base. The tuition cut does not change fees or room and board costs. Read more »

Villanova Moves Forward With Decision to Arm Public Safety Force

University entrance at the corner of Ithan and Lancaster Avenues.

University entrance at the corner of Ithan and Lancaster Avenues.                       Photo via

In an email sent Monday, Villanova University Public Safety Director and Chief of Police David Tedjeske updated students, faculty, and staff with the news that the university’s newly minted police department now has three sworn officers, and counting. According to a report by VUHoops, these officers have completed a 22-week police academy training, have access to law enforcement databases, can directly communicate with law enforcement by radio, and have the power to stop, question, and detain individuals. In addition to a firearm, officers will carry batons, handcuffs, bulletproof vests, pepper spray and body cameras. Officers will continue to be phased in, with a projected total of 19 to be hired over the course of the year.

In October of 2015, the decision to arm 20 percent of the campus public safety was publicized in an email sent by University President Rev. Peter M. Donohue, O.S.A., Ph.D., and was met almost immediately with protest. Students and faculty organized marches and open forums, videos were produced, and various organizations took to social media with the hashtag #OurPublicSafety to encourage a reversal of the decision. In November, Donohue publicly engaged with the community’s concerns at a town hall style meeting, but ultimately announced that the decision would not be overturned.  Read more »

University of Delaware Considers Changing Spring Break Schedule

university of delaware

Officials at the University of Delaware are considering an alteration to the school’s spring break schedule, according to a report from the Associated Press. The change would make the school’s break align with the breaks of other colleges in the area. The potential scheduling change comes after Willem Golden, a freshman student from Skidmore College in Saratoga Springs, New York, died at an off-campus party in MarchRead more »

Faculty Across 14 Pennsylvania Universities Could Vote on Strike

A union representing faculty at 14 state-owned universities in Pennsylvania is discussing the possibility of a strike.

The Association of Pennsylvania State College and University Faculties union said new contract negotiations with the Pennsylvania State Higher System of Education have been “stagnant.”

The faculty contract expired nearly a year ago.

On August 25th, if the majority of delegates from each of its 14 campuses approve, the APSCUF will decide on whether or not to vote on holding a strike.

The union previously postponed a strike-authorization vote set for April “out of concern for students,” according to a press release.

Read more »

Katie McGinty Wasn’t Really the First in Her Family to Attend College


Democratic Senate candidate Katie McGinty has frequently claimed throughout her campaign that she was first in her family to attend college, but a BuzzFeed report released Wednesday shows otherwise.

McGinty’s older brother, John McGinty, appears to have graduated before her – in fact, the La Salle University registrar’s office told BuzzFeed Thursday that John attended the university in January of 1971 and graduated in 1973 as part of a two-year program.

It’s also listed on his Facebook page.

This would all be fine if McGinty had specified that she was first in her family to attend a four-year university program, but she wasn’t always so clear.

Read more »

Penn Is Now Noting Disciplinary Violations on Student Transcripts

Terracotta Heraldry on the Duhring Wing.   | Steven Minicola, University of Pennsylvania  Communications.

Terracotta Heraldry on the Duhring Wing. | Steven Minicola, University of Pennsylvania Communications.

Last week, the University of Pennsylvania announced that students who violate its academic integrity, student conduct or sexual violence codes will no longer be eligible for Latin graduation honors — those “cum laude” notations that look so sexy on a diploma — or for inclusion on its Dean’s List. “In addition,” according to the official announcement, “when a student receives a sanction of probation, suspension or expulsion from the Office of Student Conduct or the Sexual Violence Investigative Officer, that sanction will be part of the student’s permanent record and, therefore, reportable outside of Penn.”

That means if you get caught smoking pot in your freshman year, or cheat on a test, or are convicted by a campus tribunal of failing to ask permission before kissing your boyfriend, your violation of school rules will now be fodder for potential employers and graduate schools. Read more »

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