“All the Features You Are Looking for in a Home” — Including the Owners

Here’s the listings copy for this home on South 10th Street:

Remarks: this wonderful house has all the features you are looking for in a home three large size bedrooms one and half baths finished basement eat in kitchen central air and lots of closet space this home features wall to wall carpeting high ceilings a beautiful eat in kitchen with lots of cabinets a full finished basement with laundry room and a powder room

Here’s what’s missing from this paragraph: punctuation, and mention of the fact that the home comes with two human beings.

• Listing: 2509 S. 10th St., Philadelphia