Ask the Expert: When Should I Send Out Thank-You Notes to Guests Who Didn’t Give a Wedding Gift?


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Question: How long after our wedding should we just go ahead and send out thank-you notes to guests who attended our wedding but didn’t (at least, yet) give a gift? We are concerned that if we wait a year (since they supposedly have that long to send), it will just look like we are looking for a gift.

Answer: Ideally, wedding guests should receive a thank-you note approximately three to five months after your Big Day, says Philadelphia wedding planner Gina Sole. “And for the couple that is tardy with giving you their gift, you can simply write in their card that you were so happy to share your special day with them.” That way, even if they opt to never send a gift, you’ve at least given them thanks for coming and celebrating with you.

Sole also encourages her brides to handwrite thank-you notes, even if it’s more time consuming. “It’s also personal, appropriate and just plain mannerly,” she says. So fire them off to all your guests in a timely window,and you can rest assured your gratitude has been shared no matter what happens with a gift.

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