How to Pee in a Wedding Dress
My mind has just been blown, ladies. And now I’m going to blow yours.
There is a way to pee whilst wearing your wedding dress—no matter how many layers of tulle and pounds of crinoline and drapes of heavy satin it’s got—without dragging half your bridal party off the dance floor every time you’ve pounded another glass of champagne (who hasn’t been one of those bridesmaids before, amiright?), or worse, going it alone and inevitably dipping that crystal-embellished sash into the frightening waters below. And it’s by using something that you could get your hands on probably within the next five minutes, no matter where you are.
It’s a trash bag.
I was just clicking through this roundup of helpful tips for your wedding day—which does, by the way, include a few great day-of tricks, such drinking a glass of water for every cocktail on your wedding day so that you aren’t bombed by the time you’ve got to cut the cake—when I saw this particular tip, and immediately investigated its origins on Offbeat Bride, where there is an ingenious step-by-step pictorial how-to for this little trash bag trick, starring the genius bride who came up with it.
To break it down, you just tear a hole in the bag that is big enough for you to step into but small enough that it’ll be fitted, and then pull it up, taking all the millions of your gown’s layers up with it! This absolutely guarantees there will be no fabric spillage into anywhere you don’t want it, and you can hold it up with one hand, leaving your other hand free to, you know, do stuff.
We should all be singing this lady’s praises. And probably sending her gifts.
If you employ this trick—or, unfathomably, have another how-to-pee-in-a-wedding-dress (by yourself) trick that you think might be even more ingenious than this—please do share any and all tales in the comments below. As any girl knows, matters of fashion and bathroom trips are very serious business.