The Sixers Just Did a BUNCH of Stuff at Trade Deadline [Updated]

Say goodbye to Evan Turner and the guy with the Obama toilet paper.

UPDATE 2: At the end of a very busy day of wheeling and dealing, with trades finalized, this is what the Sixers hauled in: Five second-round picks, for this year and future years; Pacers swingman and former All-Star Danny Granger; a bunch of role players. Here’s what they gave up: Evan Turner, Spencer Hawes, Lavoy Allen, and a future conditional second-round pick. Nice work, Hinkie.

UPDATE: Ignore vast portions of what you just read. The Sixers did just make a big move, finally getting rid of @thekidET Evan Turner, aka the guy with no money left in his bank account. They exchanged him and forward (go Owls!) Lavoy Allen to Indiana for an aging two-guard coming off an injury called Danny Granger.

Or as Howard Eskin put it:

ORIGINAL

These sorts of NBA trade-deadline deals are fuzzy around the edges until reports are confirmed and the league approves them and people pass physicals, and the like. But right now it looks like the Philadelphia 76ers just got a bunch of draft picks, a bunch of role players, and the biggest piece they gave up was the guy best known these days for having Barack Obama toilet paper, Spencer Hawes.

For the 7’1″ center Hawes, they received two first-round draft picks from the Cleveland Cavaliers, along with a couple of role players. Philly will also receive two second round picks for the ’15 and ’16 draft, along with guard Eric Maynor…for well, right now, nothing. Sure, the draft picks might come in return for picking up Maynor’s salary, but we’ve got to assume they’re giving up something else, right? Right? Finally, the team gave up a second-rounder for a big, slow white guy called Byron Mullens who will replace their dearly departed big, slow, white guy Spencer Hawes.

So…recap: A lot of movement, but none of the big pieces–Evan Turner, Thad Young–have moved.