120-Pound Molly Schuyler Wins Wing Bowl
Dan McQuade took over the Phillymag Twitter account to witness the spectacle that is Philadelphia’s Wing Bowl. He witnessed slim mother-of-four, Molly Schuyler pack away a record 363 wings. Super Squib was the top local eater, finishing in fourth with 252 wings demolished.
McQuade has calculated the length of Rocky Balboa’s run, pleaded for Blue Ivy to marry the Royal Baby and chronicled his condom purchases. This may have been his most embarrassing assignment yet: covering Wing Bowl 22. Follow along as he experienced the highs and lows of this local tradition.
.@dhm here. I'll be doing updates on Wing Bowl this morning. Pray for me. #wingbowl
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
I discovered my sentimental favorite: Polish Punisher, who apparently had to write his own placard. #wingbowl pic.twitter.com/JqiCjsf8Sq
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
There is a giant inflatable breast bouncing around the stands. Erhm. #wingbowl pic.twitter.com/TZOStIqXaE
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
They're playing a Wing Bowl song that is a parody of Ludacris' "Stand Up" and it is, by far, the most offensive thing about this. #wingbowl
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
The contestant from Penn used women from the Gold Club and not the strip club under the Chili's on campus. For shame! #wingbowl
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
"Can you stay about 15 hours more and come to our game tonight?"—Sixers coach Brett Brown, to the crowd #wingbowl
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
"She is violating her contract if she shows those lush boobs in public"—Angelo Cataldi, with insightful analysis typical of today #wingbowl
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
There is a Mayfair Swiss Cheese Pervert-themed float, obviously. #wingbowl pic.twitter.com/1UQ3A88NT5
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
Anyway, here's an uncomfortable float that has executed ex-Dallas Cowboy Roy Williams. #wingbowl pic.twitter.com/0GbClJ2B7r
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
#wingbowl pic.twitter.com/vHO6dOqMhj
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
They played Stone Cold Steve Austin's music and ex-Phillie Matt Stairs chugged two beers. #wingbowl
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
The Eagles' Jason Kelce is wearing Google Glass. #wingbowl pic.twitter.com/pb7P7uleOW
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
This is exactly how Tom Gola wanted to be remembered. #wingbowl pic.twitter.com/i2e9f9nSHI
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
The Eagles' Jason Kelce ate 65 chicken wings in 14 minutes. He didn't advance. #wingbowl pic.twitter.com/Nbtz7ZOVq9
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
WIP has asked the crowd to rate the top wingettes, which could be tough because no woman here today has been judged on her looks. #wingbowl
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
Update: Somehow, the crowd was able to do it. #wingbowl
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
Molly Schuyler leads with 186 wings after round one. In the other places are who cares. #wingbowl
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
This is where we're at in the competition. #wingbowl pic.twitter.com/AUyt0Ag0U9
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
Molly Schuyler wins Wing Bowl 22 with a record 363 wings. Super Squib is top local eater. #wingbowl
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
That's it for me. Thanks for following along! (Or, perhaps, sorry to subject you to that.)—@dhm #wingbowl
— Philly Mag (@phillymag) January 31, 2014
Follow @dhm on Twitter.
