The Holidays Are the Perfect Time to End Your Dead-End Relationship

Breaking up is hard to do, but staying in a toxic relationship is unacceptable.

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Are you dating someone who is stuck in quick sand?

You want marriage, but they need to think? You want forever, they are unsure.


Do you feel insecure? Are you always looking over your shoulder, worrying about your partner's level of commitment instead of feeling happy and carefree?

If so keep reading.


Many years ago, Neil Sedaka made the astute observation that breaking up is hard to do. Truth be told, staying in a relationship that is going nowhere is even worse!

Many people just stick it out and remain in bad situations without real satisfaction because they don’t want to do what is necessary to chart a new course for the rest of their lives.Too much time and effort has been invested to throw in the towel so why not just stay?

The fact is, it is much healthier for the heart and soul to be solo than to be with a person who brings you down or does not share the same life goals. It takes a lot of inner strength to come to the conclusion that the partner you have been in love with and thought you were marrying is not the one.There will be tears and some lonely times in the beginning, but happiness is an attainable goal.

Now that the holidays are coming up, make resolutions that relate to your personal life. Ring in 2014 with good cheer and a clean start for your future. Do not remain in the relationship buzz kill that will inevitably meander on from month to month and year to year.

It is not easy to navigate these next few months as a newly single person, but by maintaining your resolve you can realistically begin to move  toward the path of meeting the right person. Take advantage of all holiday events and gatherings and let the spirit of the season lift your mood as you put yourself out there. This joyous time can be romantic and fun with all the parties and celebrations (mistletoe anyone?). Fly solo and let your family, friends and co-workers know you are ready to move on to much bigger and brighter horizons.

In the short run, breaking up may shake your universe. Your friends and family who all got along so well with your significant other will have to adjust their patterns to fit your new world. Will Saturday nights ever be the same you might ask? The truth is, they will be better and better once the yoke of negativity is off of your neck. You'll be amazed by how many people will come out of the woodwork to offer up their honest remarks about how horrible he or she was for you. As you transition to your new life, remember: it's okay to be the 3rd or 5th wheel. Happy couples love to play cupid, especially when a relationship gone bad is finally over.

People need time to heal after couplehood ends. Some individuals take longer than others to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Focus on the positive. Do not begin to consider whether or not wedding bells will ring for your ex first. If they are on a path to commitment right away, take the high road and be happy for them. You have made the right decision not to get hitched to the wrong person. Pat yourself on the back that at least you didn't add to the already mountainous heap of the divorce wasteland.

Breaking up is hard to do but staying in a toxic relationship is unacceptable. Here are two ways to look at being alone for the short run.

"If you love something set it free. If it comes back to you, it's yours. If not, then it never was"

Or better put,"If someone wants you in their life, they'll put you there. You shouldn't have to fight for a spot."

Actions always speak louder than words.

  • VelocityVille

    “…You’ll be amazed by how many people will come out of the woodwork to
    offer up their honest remarks about how horrible he or she was for you…” Wow. Ok, so you are essentially a dishonest person with disingenuous friends. Your relationship defines “..the rest of your life…” and you’ve turned to Monica’s dizzying misuse of tired cliches as the catalyst to make a clean break from the “one thing” that is keeping you from your true awesomeness. Now comes the easy part. Ask your friends who they want to “define the rest of your life”… #stfumonica