Action Figure Modeled After New Jersey Tanning Mom

Hurry over to to pick up your very own Tanorexic action figure. For $30, you can have your very own miniature version of the woman who was arrested for child endangerment after allegedly taking her toddler tanning. Unfortunately, the doll doesn’t call you fat and jealous if you pull a string. The creation of this action figure, clearly, is definitive proof that the apocalypse is closing in. The Earth’s crust will surely split and open our existence to demons and hellfire in a matter of days. Plan accordingly. []

Around the Web

Be respectful of our online community and contribute to an engaging conversation. We reserve the right to ban impersonators and remove comments that contain personal attacks, threats, or profanity, or are flat-out offensive. By posting here, you are permitting Philadelphia magazine and Metro Corp. to edit and republish your comment in all media.