Proust’d: Liberty City Kings’ Heather Coutts (aka Lascivious Jane)

“I am the happiest whenever I am on stage and entertaining my community.”

Liberty City Kings Drag and Burlesque (LiCK) is overflowing with outlandish personalities — from tassel-swinging glamour mommas to crotch-grabbing trucker daddies — but this weekend the troupe is losing one of its most renowned members. Are you sitting? Founder Heather Coutts has been dividing her stage time between two characters — Anastascia Beaverhousen and Lascivious Jane — and she’s ready to lay one of those gals to rest. In true LiCK fashion, though, this isn’t something that can be done quietly. One of them is going to be killed off murder-mystery style this weekend in the group’s first-ever scripted show, Vixens and Vagabonds Queer and Kinky Cabaret: Murder Ze Wrote. To honor the momentous occasion, I asked Miss Coutts to answer the Proust Questionnaire, in which she takes us to her vegetable garden, gives a good tip for fishnets and gushes over her lifelong love for everything that sparkles.

What is your idea of perfect happiness? A quiet morning immersed in the lushness of my huge vegetable garden, with a cup of tea and my beautiful partner Kelly reading on the patio. What is the trait you most dislike in yourself? My ADD and anxiety, both which lead me to procrastinate. What is the trait you most dislike in others? I can’t stand passive-aggressiveness. Makes me feel aggressive! What is your greatest extravagance? Anything with sparkles, sequins, fringe or glitter. What do you consider the most overrated virtue? Piety What do you consider the most underrated vice? Envy, it just doesn’t look good on anyone. Which person, living or dead, do you most admire? I really admire my mom, she is the most incredible woman I know and my role model as a parent. Which words or phrases do you overuse? Glitter, dragtastic, glitter, and Eh (as in “I’m Canadian, eh!”) What is the quality you most like in a woman? A good sense of humour What do you dislike about your appearance? I am getting the start of spider veins on my legs. Nude fishnets and glitter make great coverups, though! What do you love about your appearance? I absolutely love my hair and my freckles. What or who is the greatest love of your life? Drag and burlesque … and glitter! When and where were you happiest? There are many places that make me happy, but I am the happiest whenever I am on stage and entertaining my community. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? If only I could be ridiculously organized in all aspects of my life. Which talent would you most like to have? I would love to be able to sing well. What do you consider to be your greatest achievement? How Liberty City Kings has grown and blossomed into the talented bunch of performers I am proud to call family. If you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what do you think it would be? A well loved house cat. What is your most treasured possession? My Nana’s silver dancing shoes. What do you value most in your friends? When my friends understand the complexity of my life. My closest friends are those that understand how busy I am and we can pick up where we left off no matter how long it’s been. What makes the perfect drag queen? Creative costuming, good comedic timing and a good understanding and appreciation of drag history. How would you like to die? On stage covered in glitter in the spotlight and surrounded by everyone I love. What is your motto? “Give a girl the right shoes and she can conquer the world” —Marlyn Monroe

Vixens and Vagabonds Queer and Kinky Cabaret: Murder Ze Wrote takes place Sat., March 2, 8 p.m.-2 a.m., Tabu Lounge and Sports Bar, 200 S. 12th St.

Other Proust questionees:

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