Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the haikus have been written, the judges have convened and a winner has been chosen for the pair of free VIP tickets to Brauhaus Schmitz’s first annual Maifest.
Because we had so many entries this time (70 haiku, by something like 60 different people), we actually called in some reinforcements in the form of our official grammar ninja and part-time haiku expert, Nora Kelly. She made the final call on the top two poems this time, and her reasoning was impeccable.
Jay: He makes references to food, which I wasn’t hot about (too easy), but points for use of German, funny/surprise factor and realism on the relationship front (I love my girlfriend, but not more than I love pretzels and beer). Also, he didn’t only list brand names, but instead incorporated food references in a breezy way. Brauhaus and its offerings got a shout-out without the poem resembling an ad. He created something that was more poetic than your average non-sequitor-y haiku.Luke B: Points for leaving out easy references to beer and food names, dual use of “wasted” (cleverness/double entendres make for solid haikus, since they’re such short poems), and general tone. Luke seems like a happy dude with a lot of self-confidence–or at least enough to wear lederhosen. Points deducted for implying he’ll be wasted for all of May.
But when it came right down to it, I chose the winner. And while it was difficult to choose on the grounds of content (Luke, I have no problem with you spending the entire month of May drunk), there was a technical concern which made the choice a simple one. So the winner is…
…Luke B. Here’s his Haiku:
Come May, you won’t be wasted,
But I will, surely!
Two reasons why Luke took this one. First, I love the phrase “Lonely suspenders,” and would use it as the name of my rockabilly band if I had my own rockabilly band.
Second, Jay’s haiku, in translation to German, did not maintain the proper 5/7/5 structure. So call it a technical foul, but Luke B wins this round.
So congratulations to all the poets and Luke, if you’re out there, drop me a line at firstname.lastname@example.org so I can get some details from you and hook you up with your tickets.