IT’S FUN TO HATE
I’m guessing that no one told Karl Rove that most of the city’s radical types live in West Philadelphia before he agreed to speak tonight at Penn’s Irvine Auditorium. Look for lots of big guys in suits with little earpieces keeping their eyes on things. Turns out that the Evildoer’s appearance is sold out, though tickets are popping up here and there on Craigslist for as little as $5. I guess some Penn coed realized that tonight is also the season premiere of America’s Next Top Model.

EXCESSIVE MUMMERY
In case you just can’t wait another 315 days for your dose of that embarrassing Philadelphia pastime, the Free Library hosts not one but two Mummers book authors, photographer E.A. Kennedy (Life, Liberty and the Mummers) and Patricia Anne Masters (The Philadelphia Mummers: Building Community Through Play), plus an appearance by the Fralinger String Band (pictured). If only Two Street were part of the deal. But hey, it’s free.

I guess some people do have a bit of disposable income … Not so long ago, the idea of driving to Atlantic City for a concert not featuring an almost-dead person was absurd. But tonight alone you’ve got Carrie Underwood/Keith Urban at Boardwalk Hall and Alanis/Matchbox Twenty at the Borgata, both of which are utterly sold out, though your friendly neighborhood scalper is surely well-stocked. Should you prefer to see the almost-dead, the the Commodores are at Trump Plaza. Well, actually, it’s the Commodores without Lionel Richie,, so I’m not sure what you call that, other than totally not worth the $50 ticket price.

Won’t this false holiday ever end? … It’s possible that you, like a lot of people, don’t celebrate Valentine’s Day on Valentine’s Day because you know that’s for suckers. So I asked Philly Mag super-intern Andrea Carayiannas (we just call her “Andrea”) to come up with some Valentine-specific suggestions for the sensibly belated among you, and here’s her short list: Hunky New York jazz vocalist Jack Donahue on unrequited love at the Art Museum’s Valentine’s Cabaret; nudity and adult situations abound in Andrew Lloyd Webber’s Aspects of Love at Plays & Players; and, uh, for the “knotty couple,” as Andrea puts it, adult-oriented Passional Boutique in Queen Village offers a two-hour “Bound for Pleasure” workshop. Hey, we don’t make the news, we just report it.

Wait a second — it’s not First Friday … In case you feel completely disconnected from the city’s visual art scene, you might want to check out Art Glut, featuring nearly 50 Philly artists. It’s not at PAFA. It’s not at the PMA. It’s not in Old City. It is, of all things, in the South Philly rowhome (aka My House Gallery) of UArts grad Alex Gartelmann. Really. There’s not even a website. Friday 5:30 to 8:30 p.m, Saturday and Sunday 10 a.m. to 3 p.m.; 2534 South 8th Street; 908-370-1656.

One of the most fascinating people you could possibly meet tonight would be preeminent Israeli photojournalist David Rubinger, who is in town at the Gershman Y to talk about his 60-year career covering his turbulent homeland (mostly for Time and Life) and his new photo essay/autobiography, Israel Through My Lens — with an introduction, I might add, by Israeli president and former P.M. Shimon Peres. 7 p.m. to 9 p.m.; tickets are $15.

EXCUSE TO WEAR PATCHOULI
Were he alive today, Bob Marley would be 63 years old and one of the coolest AARP members on Earth. On the occasion of his birthday, DJs and jam-heavy bands congregate at the Khyber for a little reminiscence. If that sounds like too much fun, opt for World Cafe Live’s screening of the documentary African Unite, which follows the surviving Marleys to their massive 2005 Ethiopia concert. View the trailer on YouTube.

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Tonight, former spy and onetime Montco resident Valerie Plame surfaces at the Constitution Center in support of her new book, Fair Game (limited space is available, $6 to $15). Our own Richard Rys recently sat down (well, on the phone, anyway) with the lovely Ms. Plame for a little Q&A …

Philadelphia magazine: Are you calling on a secure line?

Valerie Plame: Uh, no, I left my phone at the CIA. I’ll let you know if I can’t answer something. [laughs] I haven’t been asked if I’m on a secure phone since January 2006.

PM: Are you sick of hearing CIA jokes?

Plame: No, frankly, I’m sick of hearing myself talk. [laughs] I am so bored with myself! But it’s much better being on this side than being called a liar or a traitor.

Read the rest of the interview here.

Photograph by Julie Dennis