Phillies in Desperate Need of Arm Strength, Eye Candy
The dream of a breast-heavy Phillies pitching rotation officially died yesterday when the team axed Rule 5 journeyman Travis Blackley, leaving only 11 healthy arms (yes, counting Adam Eaton) for the start of opening day. The dismissal of Blackley also means his wife, model/chest exposer Arynne Tiller Blackley, will no longer be affiliated with the team, leaving only Anna Benson (center) and Heidi Strobel to stoke the smoky embers of dirtball fantasies about a Phillies Wives charity function involving high-pressure water pistols, white T-shirts and a mud pit. (This is bad news for money-strapped charity organizations as well. Tough loss, ALS.)
On last night’s Daily News Live, People Paper writer Rich Hofmann suggested that the Phillies might have a “move in their back pocket” to acquire another chucker before the roster deadline. We’re not expecting Ruben Amaro Jr. to hinge any future bullpen acquisitions on the quality of a player’s wife’s head shot, but given the current nebulous state of the Phils’ pitching staff, it certainly couldn’t make things any worse.
The healthy pitcher count is down to 11 [High Cheese]
