Victor Fiorillo’s Weekender: Anything But the Nutcracker
The best thing about Christmas being over in less than a week is not that the relatives head back from whence they came or that your checking account will finally reveal a sliver of its former self. No, it’s the fact that dance companies the world over — including our own Pennsylvania Ballet — will close the curtain on their productions of the Nutcracker. Now, they say that this tired old tradition keeps the lights on for many troupes, but there are a lot of other folks out there who’d like you to buy a ticket to their Christmas shows, too. (Plus, I’m pretty sure that the Ballet has some friends with deep pockets, like, say, Wachovia, Chrysler, and Reliance Insurance.)
Should you choose to step outside of the comfy confines of the Academy of Music and venture out into a Yuletide world less traveled, I have a few suggestions …
Spooky puppets tell Scrooge’s story in Mum Puppettheatre’s presentation of A Christmas Carol. (If you’re thinking puppet show like in Sound of Music, don’t. Think more like puppets à la Tim Burton.)
You know how when you saw the Exorcist for the first time, you thought how the hell could Linda Blair’s mother let her take a role like that? That’s an exaggerated version of the way I feel about the kids portraying loonies L. Ron Hubbard, Tom Cruise, and John Travolta in Brat Productions’ musical A Very Merry Unauthorized Children’s Scientology Pageant.
The only Christmas movie that gets my heart pitter-pattering for that morbidly obese object of childhood fantasy? A Christmas Story, starring Peter “You’ll Shoot You’re Eye Out” Billingsley. Of course, I have it on DVD (and VHS). But the Colonial is showing it on something that used to be called film. And if you don’t know what I mean, just pick up a pirated copy of Santa Clause 3 and eggnog yourself into Kingdom Come.
I remember a time, not so long ago, when I did all my shopping on Christmas Eve at the Gallery. Thank God I am a better person now, and that Philly is a better city where I can do last-minute shopping at much cooler places like, for instance, the Procrastinator’s Holiday Bazaar at the M Room on Saturday, featuring nearly two dozen local artisans and their wears (duh!) wares. Hopefully someone will have a Fishtown snowglobe.
What? You’re Jewish? Don’t worry, we have you covered, too, or at least the National Museum of American Jewish History that you (bad Jew!) never knew existed has you covered with their gazillionth annual Being Jewish at Christmas event. There will be a Jewish comedian, a Jewish puppet show and a Jewish kiddie band, among other things, which makes it sound like a great jumping off point for a Woody Allen movie.
December 21st, 2007 at 3:11 pm
you mean “artisans and their WARES”…right?
or were you talking about stuff they wear?
(PS –agree on the over-abundance of damn Nutcrackers!)
December 22nd, 2007 at 7:49 am
Just to let you know the kids in A Very Merry Unauthorized Childrens Sientology Pagaent are perfectly normal they are probably just in it for the money
and the shows run through the 30 so come and see it its quite funny