On Sunday night, the Philadelphia Eagles will find themselves in the uncomfortable confines of Gillette Stadium in Foxboro, Massachusetts, where they will do battle with the undefeated (and seemingly unstoppable) New England Patriots. Paul Flannery, editor of Bostonmagazine.com, is a former Philadelphian but a lifetime New Englander, and he’s graciously agreed to share his thoughts about the upcoming game from a Patriots fan’s perspective.

Yo, Philly:

It’s been a long time. You may not remember me, but for seven years I lived among you. That was me getting drunk at the Locust Bar, staggering home from Dirty Frank’s and trying to get a cab from the Bishop’s Collar. I bought water ice at Rita’s over on 12th and Spruce, took every first date to Monk’s and dodged rats in Rittenhouse Square, just like the rest of you.

I called the Gayborhood home. Society Hill, too, and I even lived over by Rittenhouse, along with the aforementioned vermin. And now I am back home in Boston. The Athens of America. The City of Champions. Do you what that is, Philly? That’s winner talk. I understand if you’re not familiar with it.

But I’m not here to get into all that. I’m here to talk about the Patriots. You remember the Pats, don’t you? Thought you had a chance to win a Super Bowl, but you forgot how to cover a screen pass. You couldn’t even drown your sorrows in the French Quarter after it was over, because it was in freaking Jacksonville, and the line for the Applebee’s was around the block. Right. Those Patriots.

It’s not a question of whether or not they’re going to win on Sunday. They are. Their only worthy opponent right now, outside of the Colts (maybe), is the point spread, and as I type I see them going up on a few for-amusement-purposes-only websites as 22-point favorites. Think about that. 22 points. Hell, Temple doesn’t even get 22 points anymore.

I don’t think I can remember anyone being favored by three touchdowns, and a 2-point conversion, in the NFL. Especially not against an NFC (ha-ha) playoff (stop it, you’re killing me) contender (ahem) like the Eagles.

Around the country there’s been a lot of loose talk about how the Patriots are running up the score like they’re Strath Haven and the rest of the NFL is Lower Merion. But, c’mon. When you hand the ball off to Kyle Eckel, pride of Havertown, 10 times in the second half and he gets 40 yards, can it really be said that you are “running up the score”?

No, Philly, you know better. You had Buddy Ryan once, and the only difference between Buddy and the Evil Genius That Is Belichick is that Buddy would at least tell you he was trying to humiliate someone. Well, that and an offense that actually works, but you get the idea. You respect a bully down there in Philly.

You would love Belichick. He’s an asshole. You love assholes! Just look at Daulerio.

Anyway, we just wanted to say, from up here in the city that never loses, that we’re sure it will be a fine football game on Sunday. We’re sure that the Birds will bring their “A Game” and play hard for 60 minutes, not like those Redskins who up and quit in the third quarter. Sallies. And then they’ll go home on the wrong end of a 45-7 score.

For a passionate Philadelphia response to this hurtful screed, please go to Bostonmagazine.com’s blog, Boston Daily.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, November 20th, 2007 at 2:01 pm and is filed under New England Patriots, Philadelphia Eagles, Sports. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

Posted by Paul Flannery on 11/20/07 in New England Patriots, Philadelphia Eagles, Sports