How Will the Real Stephen Colbert Play on The Late Show?

Photo | AP, Jason DeCrow

Photo | AP, Jason DeCrow

Dear Stephen (May I call you Stephen?),

Yesterday’s sudden announcement that you’re leaving The Colbert Report to replace David Letterman on The Late Show left me reeling. In fact, I threw up a little.

Like millions of others — some of them imaginary — I am a loyal member of Colbert Nation. I pledge my allegiance to you, and only you, at 11:30 p.m., Monday through Thursday, on Comedy Central. You are my hero.

My problem is twofold, Stephen (May I call you Stephen?). As a Colbert Report fan, I’m having abandonment issues. As a Penn professor, I’m worried what your departure will mean for my course, “Stewart-Colbert: Cool News.”

Read more »

Why You Need to Be Watching “Looking”

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For those who think of gay men as sexually-obsessed predators, the premiere of HBO’s “Looking” does little to disabuse that notion.

In the very first scene of Sunday’s debut, Patrick, one of three main characters, has an anonymous sexual encounter in a park. Later, Agustin, Patrick’s longtime pal, engages in a three-way at his job, and Dom hooks up with a much younger man via grindr.

It’s San Francisco, we get it. Every man with a pulse is a potential trick. Read more »

Girls Season 3: Is Hannah Growing Up?

I’m worried about Hannah.

I count on the lead character of Girls to be cuckoo like Cocoa Puffs, in an arrested-adolescent, navel-gazing, borderline-endearing sort of way. But judging by the Girls Season 3 premiere Sunday, she seems almost, well, normal. Or at least more normal than she used to be.

Oh, the horror. And on HBO!

The first of two back-to-back episodes opens with Hannah (Lena Dunham) and Adam (Adam Driver), her on-again, off-again, psycho boyfriend, not only together, but in cohabitational bliss. He has nursed her through her Season 2-ending OCD mania, and she’s going full steam on her e-memoir. Read more »

MSNBC’s Melissa Harris-Perry Needs to Stop Apologizing


If love means never having to say you’re sorry, no wonder MSNBC is single. It’s the sorriest network on the planet.

Latest to join MSNBC’s Apologia Tour is weekend host Melissa Harris-Perry, doing public penance for jokes made about Mitt Romney’s adopted African-American grandson on her December 30th show.

After several heartfelt apologies, Harris-Perry, who is biracial but identifies as black, used her Saturday broadcast to say – again — she was sorry to both Romney and to “families formed through transracial adoption.” This time, there were tears. Read more »

The Day We Ate Arnold the Pig


Photo |

It’s not every day that a family of Jews hosts a pig roast, but that is exactly what my sister did at her suburban Washington home Sunday.

Not just any pig roast, mind you, but a whole pig roast, complete with Porky’s head, ears, snout, mouth and teeth. All festively festooned with a red ribbon. It was the centerpiece of the feast, which I had dubbed  pigapalooza. Read more »

Is Your Husband Gay?

Here’s a cheery thought for the holidays: American women would rather have a cheating, alcoholic, depressed, heterosexual husband than a gay one. Discuss.

This gem popped up in a piece in the New York Times’ “Sunday Review” about the underreporting of gay men in the U.S. The writer, Seth Stephens-Davidowitz, is a newly-minted Harvard Ph.D. in economics.

When you think about it, what red-blooded heterosexual gal wouldn’t prefer a drunk, morose, skirt-chasing spouse to a homosexual male, no matter how polite or fashionably accessorized? Read more »

Philly Needs an All-Chanukah Radio Station

What does Philadelphia radio have against the Jews?

For years, we Christ Killers have been subjected to non-stop Christmas music, beginning before Thanksgiving and continuing through December 25th. If that’s not tedious enough, it feels like it starts earlier every season. Hell, why not Labor Day?

“You can always switch stations, Shoshanna,” I can hear you thinking. Of course I can, Mary, but there is a larger issue in play: Where is the 24-hour-a-day Chanukah music? Read more »

Thanksgiving with the Cheney Family!


Thanksgiving dinner chez Cheney could be an awkward affair this year.

Former Vice President Dick Cheney’s daughters are in a nasty public feud over same-sex marriage. Liz is out (pardon the pun) campaigning against the issue in her Wyoming Senate race. Mary, her kid sister, has a wife and two young children.

Talk about a tense turkeyfest.

This is our imagined scenario for Thursday: Read more »

Alec Baldwin Should Be Fired

Alec Baldwin

Alec Baldwin is a cocksucking fag hater.

For anyone who thinks I just accused Baldwin of being a “cocksucking fag hater,” shame on you. I would never ever hurl such a heinous epithet at my favorite Baldwin brother.

In fact, an acoustic analysis will show, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that what I really said was: “Alec Baldwin, stop sucking your thumb and cook the friggin’ turkey.” Read more »

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