The Weekender: Official Fringe, Unofficial Fringe, and Non-Fringe

Your guide to living well through the next two three days...

As if you didn't know, the Philadelphia Live Arts Festival/Philly Fringe starts today, with gobs and gobs of artists from all over the world coming to the Birthplace of Freedom to get all theatrical on your ass. Philadelphia magazine theater critic MB Case gives you a thoughtful list of her picks — both Live Arts (the curated, pretty-safe-bet portion) and Fringe (the uncurated, who-knows portion) — here. Check back on Tuesday for day-by-day suggestions for the week.

And since I love me a good fight, I can't go without mentioning the Unofficial Fringe Cabaret. The festival used to sport a nightly free cabaret where pretty much everyone went to party late night, drinking, dancing, and being entertained by some of Philadelphia's most entertaining. But this year, Nick Stuccio, the Great Benevolent Leader (profiled here by Vicki Glembocki) of the Live Arts/Fringe, decided to cancel it. So, an eccentric character named Scott Johnston, who was with the festival pretty much since the beginning, decided to give a big ol' F.U. to Stuccio by investing thousands of his own money into putting on the Unofficial Cabaret. Tonight it starts at Johnny Brenda's. And tomorrow it's at South Philly's New Alhambra, where, I should probably mention, my band, The Martha Graham Cracker Cabaret, will headline. Click here for a complete schedule.

Okay, so enough about Fringe. For a far less chaotic time, hit Salem County (that's in New Jersey) for the 37th Annual Bluegrass Festival. Think banjos and performers with first names like Del and Doyle. You can pick up a full weekend pass (camping included) for $67.50, which leaves plenty of money left over for contraband.

I'm not sure who is supposed to be promoting this next show, but they're not doing a very good job, since the first I heard about it was from a flyer on the floor of a Septa bus last night. Sweet-funkstress Chaka Khan is making an appearance on Monday (your extra day off) at the Neighborhood to Neighborhood Street Festival at 50th and Baltimore, which is actually a pretty decent area of the city (I used to live there); the tofu hoagies at the little deli at 47th and Baltimore are a good option if you don't want all that pricey festival food. There will also be karaoke, line dancing, and something exciting called a "senior pavilion." Living on the edge, people.

And briefly, if you're into boats, there's a regatta on Cooper River. Like to touch? The Please Touch Museum holds its closing weekend festivities Friday-Monday. Drinking your thing? Newish Memphis Tap Room hosts a Mystery Beer Weekend. Or do you need a bloodthirsty killer bunny to get you going? Spamalot closes at the Academy.